Foreplay can mean the difference between a standard oral sex experience and the best. time. ever. To up the excitement, start by licking, blowing, stroking, and kissing everything but his penis. “Wait until he’s flushed, panting, and practically — or really! — begging for it. It’ll be more than worth the wait,” says Scalisi. You could also turn foreplay into a game with some Naughty Roll Play Dice ($18, babeland.com). They'll tell you exactly where to touch each other.
Straddle your man (lying on his back) and slowly lower yourself onto his pelvis, sliding his penis inside you as you go. But rather than sitting down in a straddle position, raise yourself up off him in a squatting position. Put your hands on his thighs, stomach, rib cage or upper chest for support. Start by sliding yourself up and down his member by lifting your lower body up and down — a totally different motion than going forward and back like regular woman-on-top. Vary your pace, starting with some fast, teasingly shallow thrusts that touch only the tip of his penis, then move down into deep, slower thrusts that envelop him completely. The fabulous friction you'll create will give you the double bonus of amazing sensations all along the edge of your vaginal opening when you pump shallow and on your G-spot when you pump deep. And if you try leaning backward and resting your hands on his thighs and knees, the sensation will even spread to your clitoris — and the natural arching of your back will open up your body for him to fondle.
Along the same lines of not being bashful, Dr. Jill McDevitt, CalExotics’ Resident Sexologist, says it’s really important to spread the labia during cunnilingus. This way, your partner has the space to approach the clitoris from all angles and sides. “Typically, beginners are really bashful about this, but spread the labia wide, get in the folds, and sensation will improve.” This is also good to keep in mind when you’re receiving cunnilingus. Don’t be afraid to reach down and ~show yourself~ for your partner.
Books are an easy way to jump-start your own sex ed. The Big Bang by Nerve is a great entry-level primer to all things sex. She Comes First by Ian Kerner is an incredible book about refining your oral sex technique. Check out some books about sex positions or female orgasm. These are all fun topics to brush up on, so this shouldn’t ever feel like a chore!
Arousal The man perceives something or someone that prompts sexual interest. That perception prompts the brain to send a signal down the spinal cord to the sex organs, causing an erection. The penis becomes erect when blood fills spongy tissue inside its shaft, brought by arteries that have expanded to allow blood to race in at up to 50 times its normal speed. The veins in the penis that normally drain blood out squeeze shut so that more blood remains inside, producing a firm erection. The scrotum pulls toward the body, and muscles throughout the body increase in tension.
Doctors used to think that human papillomavirus (HPV), the most common sexually transmitted infection in the United States, couldn’t affect the mouth. But recent research has them rethinking this notion. Scientists have now shown that the same high-risk strains of HPV that lead to cervical cancer can also be transmitted by oral sex and potentially cause head, neck, and throat cancer, as well.