The Sultry Sidewinder allows you the sort of languishing, leisurely pace that, in the end, packs a real punch. (Slow and steady can win the climax race!) "Orgasms that result from a long, slow buildup are frequently much stronger than those that are achieved with fast and intense stimulation," explains Stubbs. "By savoring every single sensation, you're able to achieve a higher level of pleasure in the end." (Think of it like a getting-it-on gearshift — if you go straight from first to fifth, you get a quick drop-off, but if you go from first to second and so forth, your erotic engine will be humming by the time you get there.) Plus, this side-by-side setup is great for intimacy, which can sometimes get lost in the shuffle and storminess of sex. All the eye contact, kissing and closeness of this position will drive your slow climb to orgasm.
Fellatio can be sexually arousing for both participants, and may lead to orgasm for the receiving partner.[3][4] It may be performed by a sexual partner as foreplay before other sexual activities (such as vaginal or anal intercourse),[3][8] or as an erotic and physically intimate act in its own right.[3][4] Like most forms of sexual activity, oral sex creates a risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections (STIs/STDs). However, the transmission risk for oral sex, especially HIV transmission, is significantly lower than for vaginal or anal sex.[9][10][11]
Positions that tend to allow men full control of penetration (this can mean depth, rhythm, etc.) tend to give men more pleasure. “This typically means that rear-entry positions allow for the most access as he is in control and her body allows deeper penetration in these positions, whether it's doggy style or some other variation,” says Dr. Kat Van Kirk, a licensed marriage and sex therapist and resident sex expert for www.AdamandEve.com.  

Books are an easy way to jump-start your own sex ed. The Big Bang by Nerve is a great entry-level primer to all things sex. She Comes First by Ian Kerner is an incredible book about refining your oral sex technique. Check out some books about sex positions or female orgasm. These are all fun topics to brush up on, so this shouldn’t ever feel like a chore!
To Control – Using sex as a weapon and method for controlling your man is a recipe for disaster. If you start withholding sex to try to get your husband to do something, then both of you are going to develop a negative attitude towards all things sex very quickly. Equally, promising to give him a blow job only if he does this or that is going to foster an unhealthy situation for your sex life.

So, your special night of you-fun may mean an extra-special blowjob — and there’s no doubt that’s special!  — or that being the night you try something kinkier, like role-play, for the first time. That’s great. It may also be the time you go for anal sex, or try sex in the shower or car sex, or somewhere more adventurous. That can be super fun as well. But it doesn’t end there.


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Hey Sean, so I just met this guy about a couple weeks ago. But instead of taking things slow like we had planned, we can’t help already wanting to take the next step in our relationship. I’ve never had sex before, and I want to impress him and keep him interested in me, having it be my first time. Can you please help give me some tips on my first time of having sex to keep him interested in me. Please!
It may be surprising to hear, but men love foreplay to be drawn out significantly longer more than most women think[3]. So, while giving him a quickie BJ can be super hot for both of you (like say sneaking away for a few minutes at a party), you’ll find that a slow, teasing build up is going to result in your man blowing a bigger load[4]…and a bigger smile on his face. This is probably the most powerful, but also the most overlooked blow job tip you can learn. With this in mind, here are a bunch of great “fellatio foreplay” tips that you can use before giving your man head:
Perhaps the most important aspect of Schlissel's sleuthing is that excerpts from West's obscenity trial and disturbingly the censor's accusations sound as troubling today as they did 80 years ago. The arguments used 80 years ago to ban Mae West's bon mots are not unlike those used today to bar gay and lesbian artists from public funding and public self-expression.

After massaging him for a few minutes, help him take off his trousers and briefs. Then just keep doing what you were doing, running your hands over his manhood. If you like, you can also softly trace your fingers up and down his dick and around his balls. If you want to learn more hand job techniques, then make sure to check out the Hand Job Guide here.
Want to take the action up a notch? Hum while he's inside your mouth. "The vibrations create an added sensation," say Michaels and Johnson. "Holding a vibrator against your cheek can do the same thing." Finally, don't underestimate the power of a well-timed moan on your end. "Making erotic sounds isn't only a turn on for him. It can also get you more excited," explain Michaels and Johnson.

Schissel argues that West provided one of the first role models for women suggesting they could be independent and achieve success following through on their own ambitions. When a revival of Sex was mounted in Seattle in 1998, a review noted, "What dates this show more than all the quaint wink-and nod lewdness are a couple of incredibly racist lines that I'm glad they didn't cut. At one point, Margy LaMont tells a guy there's no way he could get himself a woman, at least not a white women. Later a character tells Margy that she could make good money whoring in Trinidad "'cause all the girls down there are half black."


Bacterial vaginosis (vaginal inflammation caused by bacterial overgrowth) is easily spread from woman to woman, but HIV/AIDS is much less likely to be passed on this way, for example. If you’re a lesbian or bisexual woman who has had sex with men, you’re more at risk of the full range of STIs. Talk to your doctor about testing if you’re concerned you may be at risk.
The chance an HIV-negative person will get HIV from oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is extremely low. However, it is hard to know the exact risk because a lot of people who have oral sex also have anal or vaginal sex. The type of oral sex that may be the riskiest is mouth-to-penis oral sex. But the risk is still very low, and much lower than with anal or vaginal sex. 

When Lillian Schissel edited "Three Plays by Mae West,' published in 1997, it marked the first time Sex, The Drag and The Pleasure Man had ever been printed. Long thought to be lost, the original manuscripts gathered dust at the Library of Congress. After prolonged legal wrangling with the Roger Richman Agency of Los Angeles, who at the time represented the Mae West receivership estate, a deal was finally struck to have the plays finally published. 

15. Sometimes a penis doesn't smell good and that's because some men are disgusting. I don't think anyone expects a hard penis to smell like Chanel perfume or strawberry Lipsmackers or whatever (although OMG, they should) but some guys are less clean than others. Also. People sweat more in the summertime. Consider this. The crotch area is not free of sweat glands. Personally, I don't think it's rude to kindly suggest a sexy shower together beforehand.
20. This is one thing that porn can actually teach you a lot about, like the graphic sex ed you never had in school. Sex ed should definitely be better in this country but I really doubt we'll ever have gym coaches teaching good blow job decorum in front of a bunch of confused teenagers. And that's probably for the best? Anyway. People don't fuck IRL like they do in porn, but sometimes those close-up shots of someone ferociously sucking a D can serve as good little tutorials on how to move your head. Just don't attempt deep-throating if you're not very experienced.
Chlamydia, human papillomavirus (HPV), gonorrhea, herpes, hepatitis (multiple strains), and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs), can be transmitted through oral sex.[4][5][26] Any sexual exchange of bodily fluids with a person infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, poses a risk of infection. Risk of STI infection, however, is generally considered significantly lower for oral sex than for vaginal or anal sex, with HIV transmission considered the lowest risk with regard to oral sex.[5][6][27][28] 

"Depth is definitely a plus for some guys, and with his partner’s legs over his arms or shoulders, missionary becomes a deeper position. But the greatest number of nerve endings on the penis is around the coronal ridge, colloquially known as the cock head; for this kind of stimulation, more pressure or tightness is a good idea. Try the missionary variant where his partner crosses her legs to add more pressure,” 

There are a whole bunch of places on his body (besides the shaft of his penis!) that are supersensitive and can lead to a mind-blowing experience. For starters, work the area around his penis — his balls, obviously, the scrotum, and the perineum (that place between his balls and his butt). Feel free to let your hands roam over other sensitive areas around his body, too — like behind his knees, his butt, and his inner thighs.
Hey Jack, i had so much fun reading the book ! bad timing getting it during exam week ! i barely studied ! lol , and even read it at the job ! ( call center, not so bad ahahah ) well, totally worth it ! He even told me '' i dont think its healthy for me to cum that hard '' you made me proud of my blow jobs ! I never had problem with the passion part, in fact , before i felt like i enoyed giving him head more then he liked receiving it !! So a lot of the techniques were good for me. thanks again ! 

In terms of mastering the oral sex process, speed isn't the name of the game. “Trust me when I say that things will move a whole lot faster if you slow everything down,” says Morse. Take the time to get familiar with the female anatomy, which you can do using your eyes and your hands. “The clitoris, which is located above the vaginal opening, contains about 8,000 pleasure-packed nerve endings." Make it the area where you focus most of your attention.
After massaging him for a few minutes, help him take off his trousers and briefs. Then just keep doing what you were doing, running your hands over his manhood. If you like, you can also softly trace your fingers up and down his dick and around his balls. If you want to learn more hand job techniques, then make sure to check out the Hand Job Guide here.
Try this: reverse finger job. Make two tight rings around his penis with your thumb and index finger (like you’re doing the okay hand symbol 👌), stacking them one on top of the other, in the middle of his shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of his shaft at the same time. Cox calls this a “torrid twist” the the typical one-handed uppy-downey handy. Remember to use lube, though!
Well since reading your book. Our love has connected us, on many levels, I would of never believed it without seeing it with my own eyes, my husband is "in love" with me. He loves the new me, I send him little text messages, and he get's arroused, and so do I just thinking about, being with him. We actually feel as though we are having a affair with each other, because the things we are doing and saying, would under normal circumstances, would never happen. I feel young again, and like I am in love for the first time.
Getting HIV from oral sex may be less likely than vaginal or anal sex, but it still carries risk. If you are having oral sex you should still protect yourself. Repeated unprotected oral sex exposure to HIV may represent a considerable risk for spread of HIV, as well as other STDs for which the risk of spread through oral sex has not been as well studied.
Oral sex should be limited to the protected areas. A makeshift dental dam can be made out of a condom[22] or a latex or nitrile glove,[23] but using a real dental dam is seen as preferable; this is because real dental dams cover a larger area, avoid accidents caused by "slipping" outside the covered area, and avoid the risk that makeshift versions may be accidentally damaged or poked with the scissors during the cutting procedure. Plastic wrap may also be used as a barrier during oral sex, but there exists no conclusive scientific research regarding how effective it may or may not be at preventing disease transmission. Certain kinds of plastic wrap are manufactured to be microwaveable and are designed to have pores that open when heated, but there also exists no scientific research on what effect, if any, this has on disease transmission when used during oral sex.[24] Some people complain that the thickness of the plastic dulls sensation.
In terms of mastering the oral sex process, speed isn't the name of the game. “Trust me when I say that things will move a whole lot faster if you slow everything down,” says Morse. Take the time to get familiar with the female anatomy, which you can do using your eyes and your hands. “The clitoris, which is located above the vaginal opening, contains about 8,000 pleasure-packed nerve endings." Make it the area where you focus most of your attention.
As many guys get close to orgasm, they typically just want you to keep doing that one thing you're doing without stopping 'til they get there. A little boring, but whatever. However, at the beginning to build up anticipation you can try shaking up your routine. Think alternating longer ice-cream style licks with more traditional full-mouth-over-the-peen sucking.
Fellatio is sometimes practiced when penile penetration would create a physical difficulty for a sex partner. For example, it may be practiced during pregnancy instead of vaginal intercourse by couples wishing to engage in intimate sexual activity while avoiding the difficulty of vaginal intercourse during later stages of pregnancy.[18] There may be other reasons why a woman may not wish to have vaginal intercourse, such as apprehension of losing her virginity, of becoming pregnant,[12][14] or she may be menstruating.
If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.
^ Jump up to: a b Bryan Strong; Christine DeVault; Theodore F. Cohen (2010). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationship in a Changing Society. Cengage Learning. p. 186. ISBN 0-534-62425-1. Retrieved October 8, 2011. Most people agree that we maintain virginity as long as we refrain from sexual (vaginal) intercourse. But occasionally we hear people speak of 'technical virginity' [...] Data indicate that 'a very significant proportion of teens ha[ve] had experience with oral sex, even if they haven't had sexual intercourse, and may think of themselves as virgins' [...] Other research, especially research looking into virginity loss, reports that 35% of virgins, defined as people who have never engaged in vaginal intercourse, have nonetheless engaged in one or more other forms of heterosexual sexual activity (e.g., oral sex, anal sex, or mutual masturbation).
Schissel argues that West provided one of the first role models for women suggesting they could be independent and achieve success following through on their own ambitions. When a revival of Sex was mounted in Seattle in 1998, a review noted, "What dates this show more than all the quaint wink-and nod lewdness are a couple of incredibly racist lines that I'm glad they didn't cut. At one point, Margy LaMont tells a guy there's no way he could get himself a woman, at least not a white women. Later a character tells Margy that she could make good money whoring in Trinidad "'cause all the girls down there are half black."

Try this: reverse finger job. Make two tight rings around his penis with your thumb and index finger (like you’re doing the okay hand symbol 👌), stacking them one on top of the other, in the middle of his shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of his shaft at the same time. Cox calls this a “torrid twist” the the typical one-handed uppy-downey handy. Remember to use lube, though!
The Pleasure Man was put on trial 2 years after the premiere, charging the company for "sex, degeneracy, and sex perversion". The trial was riddled with homophobia, chastising the “degenerates” that they saw on the stage, and asking if their manners of female impersonation carried on off stage. The jury failed to reach a decision and the charges were dismissed. West never appeared in court and was fined $60,000[1]
Although these sexually transmitted infections usually manifest in the genital area, they can also appear in the mouth and throat. “I have seen infections in which people think they have strep throat and they go to the student health center,” says Dr. Rosser. “When they test positive for chlamydia or gonorrhea, they have to come to me for treatment.” Curing either bacterial STI usually entails a course of antibiotics.
Although these sexually transmitted infections usually manifest in the genital area, they can also appear in the mouth and throat. “I have seen infections in which people think they have strep throat and they go to the student health center,” says Dr. Rosser. “When they test positive for chlamydia or gonorrhea, they have to come to me for treatment.” Curing either bacterial STI usually entails a course of antibiotics.
As someone who was sexually abused throughout most of my childhood, I’ve been reluctant to give head because of the flashbacks. I’ve been reading your blog for a few days now, and I feel confident in knowing more techniques to try out on my partner that are 100% different from all that bad stuff. In the twelve years since I’ve escaped, I’ve never felt so confident to try this out with my partner, so THANK YOU! I’m sure he will enjoy it too!
90% of men adore when women give them a blowjob; also, it is quite important for women to make it more diverse and not in such a systematic way, because there is a major risk for her to be tired of it. There is a great range of blowjob positions, starting from the most traditional, with a relaxedmanlying on his back, to the fastidious one, when a denuded female partner at the maximum leveloverwhelms all the sensations experienced by her male partner. Primarily, a blowjob position directly-proportionally depends on your partner’s preferences, thus, take in mind all his feelings and desires. The blowjob involves using the hands and mouth, fingers, skilled tongue and even breast: caresshis penisgently, be sufficientlyrude, – and the resultwill not be long in coming. Many of women consider blowjob as something insufferable, but mind the fact, that while using such a petting, the man is entirely under your control and you may do with him everything you want.
Oral sex is commonly practiced by sexually active adults. Oral sex can happen between heterosexual (straight) and same-sex (gay or lesbian) couples. More than 85% of sexually active adults aged 18-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. A separate survey conducted during 2007-2010 found that 33% of teenage girls and boys aged 15-17 years reported having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
Oral sex is common among sexually active adults. According to a national survey conducted from June 2006 through December 2008, over 80% of sexually active youth and adults ages 15-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. The same survey found that 45% or more of teenage girls and boys (ages 15-19 years) report having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
Try this: Suck his lower lip into your mouth the next time you’re making out and use the tip of your tongue to stroke this under-lip area. "That motion stimulates the whole erogenous zone in a teasing way, which will put him on the erotic edge," says Paget. "And by keeping his lower lip inside yours, you magnify the sensation. It'll feel as if electric currents are shooting from his mouth straight to his member."
Straddle your man (lying on his back) and slowly lower yourself onto his pelvis, sliding his penis inside you as you go. But rather than sitting down in a straddle position, raise yourself up off him in a squatting position. Put your hands on his thighs, stomach, rib cage or upper chest for support. Start by sliding yourself up and down his member by lifting your lower body up and down — a totally different motion than going forward and back like regular woman-on-top. Vary your pace, starting with some fast, teasingly shallow thrusts that touch only the tip of his penis, then move down into deep, slower thrusts that envelop him completely. The fabulous friction you'll create will give you the double bonus of amazing sensations all along the edge of your vaginal opening when you pump shallow and on your G-spot when you pump deep. And if you try leaning backward and resting your hands on his thighs and knees, the sensation will even spread to your clitoris — and the natural arching of your back will open up your body for him to fondle.

As with other types of sexual activity, oral sex carries the risk of STIs. It may be possible to get some STIs in the mouth or throat from giving oral sex to a partner with a genital or anal/rectal infection, particularly from giving fellatio. It also may be possible to get certain STIs on the penis, and possibly the vagina, anus or rectum, from receiving oral sex from a partner with a mouth or throat infection. It’s possible to have an STI in more than one area, for example in the throat and the genitals.
No two penises (or guys) are alike — which means that every man will have different specific turn-ons. Don't rely on tricks that you used on other penises in the past. Ask your partner what he likes while you're trying new things — more pressure? More suction? There's no better way to give him a mind-blowing O than to give him exactly what he likes.
"The key is to breathe in through your mouth and out through your nose. If you can learn circular breathing (something musicians who play instruments that require breath know), you can go down on a girl for hours without having to come up for air. It's actually reverse circular breathing. To make sure your tongue doesn't cramp up, keep your jaw comfortably open and loose. I've found that upward strokes under the clitoral hood where the clitoris is are one of the best motions."
I bet you’ve never thought about your dude’s Adam’s apple as an erogenous zone, huh? If you have, congrats, you should probably be writing this instead of me. But for the normies out there, the thought behind this stems from how the thyroid (just below the Adam’s apple) is “closely linked to the sex organs, according to ancient Chinese medicine,” according to reflexologist Mantak Chia, author of Sexual Reflexology.
It may be surprising to hear, but men love foreplay to be drawn out significantly longer more than most women think[3]. So, while giving him a quickie BJ can be super hot for both of you (like say sneaking away for a few minutes at a party), you’ll find that a slow, teasing build up is going to result in your man blowing a bigger load[4]…and a bigger smile on his face. This is probably the most powerful, but also the most overlooked blow job tip you can learn. With this in mind, here are a bunch of great “fellatio foreplay” tips that you can use before giving your man head:
Most countries do not have laws that ban the practice of oral sex, though some cultures may consider it taboo.[3] People may also have negative feelings or sexual inhibitions about giving or receiving oral sex; they may refuse to engage in it of their own volition.[3] Commonly, people do not regard forms of oral sex as affecting the virginity of either partner, though opinions on the matter vary.[12][13][14][15]
Once you’ve located the clitoris, you don’t want to immediately rush in. “Tease her with your mouth and hands to build anticipation and arousal. Kiss her softly around the clitoris, gently nibble on her inner thighs and take your time slowly pulling off her underwear,” says Morse. You can also heighten arousal by touching and kissing her through the fabric. Once you're dealing with bare skin, you can start with slow tongue motions. Moving slowly, lick up and down, with gentle strokes and a flat tongue. 
^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and pages 47-49 for views on what constitutes virginity loss and therefore sexual intercourse or other sexual activity; source discusses how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in penile-vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
As someone who was sexually abused throughout most of my childhood, I’ve been reluctant to give head because of the flashbacks. I’ve been reading your blog for a few days now, and I feel confident in knowing more techniques to try out on my partner that are 100% different from all that bad stuff. In the twelve years since I’ve escaped, I’ve never felt so confident to try this out with my partner, so THANK YOU! I’m sure he will enjoy it too!
Tanya's Deep-throat Manifesto, my co-author and friend Tanya J., a former adult film star, teaches you the ins and outs of deep-throating like a pro – killing your gag-reflex has never been this easy. Believe it or not – mastering the art of deep-throating is your one way ticket to a loving relationship. Once you go "all in" he'll never view you the same again.
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