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In terms of mastering the oral sex process, speed isn't the name of the game. “Trust me when I say that things will move a whole lot faster if you slow everything down,” says Morse. Take the time to get familiar with the female anatomy, which you can do using your eyes and your hands. “The clitoris, which is located above the vaginal opening, contains about 8,000 pleasure-packed nerve endings." Make it the area where you focus most of your attention.
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how men can be better sexual partners to women.
The Perineum: Also known as the Valley of Gormi, according to my 19-year-old nephew – don’t ask – the area just underneath the family jewels is a major pleasure point. This is because the prostate gland is located there, so while you’re doing his business down there, rub it in a circular motion. It makes things so much hotter. Madonna, is it August again in here?
Despite what you may have seen in porn, you shouldn’t feel like you have to immediately jam his entire penis down your throat (or even at all). "Gagging takes you both out of the moment, and you and he will enjoy oral sex much more when you're both having fun," says Marsh. You can achieve a similar sensation by gripping the base of his shaft, and moving your hand and mouth in a rhythmic motion. (Flavored lube will make this a lot easier.)
Experts say the risk of contracting HIV/AIDS from an HIV-positive person during oral sex is extremely low, but it’s difficult to know exactly because people often participate in vaginal or anal sex at the same time as oral sex (which, when unprotected, both offer a much greater risk than oral sex). The form of oral sex posing the greatest risk is mouth-to-penis oral sex.

The couple had participated in both vaginal and oral sex since the man’s Brazil trip, but he had only ejaculated during fellatio, doctors wrote in the New England Journal of Medicine. It’s possible that she could have been infected with the Zika virus from “pre-ejaculate secretions” or “deep kissing,” they wrote, but it’s more likely she got it from swallowing his semen.


Most countries do not have laws that ban the practice of oral sex, though some cultures may consider it taboo.[3] People may also have negative feelings or sexual inhibitions about giving or receiving oral sex; they may refuse to engage in it of their own volition.[3] Commonly, people do not regard forms of oral sex as affecting the virginity of either partner, though opinions on the matter vary.[12][13][14][15]
As with other types of sexual activity, oral sex carries the risk of STIs. It may be possible to get some STIs in the mouth or throat from giving oral sex to a partner with a genital or anal/rectal infection, particularly from giving fellatio. It also may be possible to get certain STIs on the penis, and possibly the vagina, anus or rectum, from receiving oral sex from a partner with a mouth or throat infection. It’s possible to have an STI in more than one area, for example in the throat and the genitals.
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^ Jump up to: a b Tan, Min; Gareth Jones; Guangjian Zhu; Jianping Ye; Tiyu Hong; Shanyi Zhou; Shuyi Zhang; Libiao Zhang (October 28, 2009). Hosken, David, ed. "Fellatio by Fruit Bats Prolongs Copulation Time". PLoS ONE. 4 (10): e7595. Bibcode:2009PLoSO...4.7595T. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0007595. PMC 2762080. PMID 19862320. Retrieved October 28, 2009.
Want to take the action up a notch? Hum while he's inside your mouth. "The vibrations create an added sensation," say Michaels and Johnson. "Holding a vibrator against your cheek can do the same thing." Finally, don't underestimate the power of a well-timed moan on your end. "Making erotic sounds isn't only a turn on for him. It can also get you more excited," explain Michaels and Johnson.
If you are sexually active, you should get tested regularly for STDs and HIV and talk to your partner(s) about STDs. If you think you might have an STD, stop having sex and visit your doctor or clinic to get tested. There are free and low-cost options for testing in your area. It is important that you talk openly with your health care provider about any activities that might put you at risk for an STD, including oral sex.  
Knowledge about the link between HPV and throat cancer varied among dentists interviewed for the article; some reported already discussing the connection with their patients, and most reported conducting cancer screenings. But dentists should do more to create awareness and increase patients’ knowledge about HPV, the authors wrote—including providing information about vaccination and prevention practices.
Getting HIV from oral sex may be less likely than vaginal or anal sex, but it still carries risk. If you are having oral sex you should still protect yourself. Repeated unprotected oral sex exposure to HIV may represent a considerable risk for spread of HIV, as well as other STDs for which the risk of spread through oral sex has not been as well studied.

Resolution and refraction After ejaculation, the penis begins to lose its erection. About half of the erection is lost immediately, and the rest fades soon after. Muscle tension fades, and the man may feel relaxed or drowsy, according to Ingber. Men usually must undergo a refractory period, or recovery phase, during which they cannot achieve another erection. This period is variable in men, says Ingber. In an 18-year-old, this is typically less than 15 minutes. In elderly men, it can be up to 10 to 20 hours. The average refractory period is about half an hour. Men differ from women in that men usually are satiated after one orgasm. Women can experience more than one orgasm with no loss of sexual arousal, and do not have to undergo a refractory period.


The trick here is getting the height right. The guy needs to be able to line up with the head without stretching or squatting. You can also try this oral sex position while lying on a dining room table or even a pool table. Remember, deep throating is a very advanced skill and won't be pleasurable or comfortable for everyone, so go slowly with exploring this position and make sure you're both enjoying it.
This trick was mentioned in the movie Girls Trip, and demos can even be found on YouTube. But a urologist previously told Health that it’s definitely not a good idea. "The urethra isn't designed to handle grapefruit juice," Michael Eisenberg, MD, a urologist at Stanford University Medical Center in California, said in 2017. In fact, the acidity can lead to side effects like burning during urination.
Fellatio is sometimes practiced when penile penetration would create a physical difficulty for a sex partner. For example, it may be practiced during pregnancy instead of vaginal intercourse by couples wishing to engage in intimate sexual activity while avoiding the difficulty of vaginal intercourse during later stages of pregnancy.[18] There may be other reasons why a woman may not wish to have vaginal intercourse, such as apprehension of losing her virginity, of becoming pregnant,[12][14] or she may be menstruating.
^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and pages 47-49 for views on what constitutes virginity loss and therefore sexual intercourse or other sexual activity; source discusses how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in penile-vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
Hand Massage – This one is probably the easiest to get right. While you are kissing him or just talking to him or while you’re just physically close to him, put your hand on his crotch. So your hand should be resting on his briefs or his trousers. To make it smooth, start by first placing your hand on his leg and moving it up from there. Then just softly start massaging his penis and testicles outside of his trousers/briefs.
15. Sometimes a penis doesn't smell good and that's because some men are disgusting. I don't think anyone expects a hard penis to smell like Chanel perfume or strawberry Lipsmackers or whatever (although OMG, they should) but some guys are less clean than others. Also. People sweat more in the summertime. Consider this. The crotch area is not free of sweat glands. Personally, I don't think it's rude to kindly suggest a sexy shower together beforehand.
Bad news first: Blow jobs are always a little bit intimidating. Thrusting your face at a penis is hard sometimes — pun intended, obviously. But it's especially nerve-wracking the very first time you do it. Just like you were probably a little nervous the first time you tried some wild new food, it can be scary to put something brand new in your mouth.
i sip on a hot cup of coffee when i suck my lover rexs cock and balls slowly licking kissing it drives him wild i suck the head tounge the hole i love feeling his cock grow hard in my mouth, tasting him , and starts throbbing which gets me off and when he explodes i love his cum on my face,tittys he taste so good i massage his cum all over my face,tits with his cock,then he blows me i cum fast he turns me on .i sleep with his dick in my mouth nothing better than swallowing hot cum for breakfast,wake up call people.
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So many men bemoan the fact that women don’t feel more comfortable with sex, but then they turn around and slut-shame women. The shaming of female sexuality is horrifyingly pervasive, and it has serious consequences. If you want women to have sex with you, you have to make it safe for them to actually do so. Don’t degrade women by calling them names, objectifying their bodies, or disrespecting their boundaries.
Lines like “it doesn’t mean we’ve had real sex – you’ll still be a virgin”, or “if you don’t want sex then you should at least go down on me”, or “it’s not as risky as having intercourse”, all suggest pressure and coercion. Remember that oral sex should be fun for both of you. If one person is doing it because they feel pressured, it can sour the whole experience.
Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  

Great lovers are made, not born! This is a point that I bring up time and time again. So many people expect sex to be effortless, but it rarely works that way in the real world. Just like any other skill, being good in bed takes time, practice, and education. There are so many topics to learn about, including sexual health, STI and pregnancy prevention, sexual technique, and communication.


Another risk of oral sex is strain on your relationship, particularly if one of you doesn’t enjoy it or has concerns about it. One partner may have anxiety about their oral sexual performance or what their partner will think of them during oral sex. Or oral sex may make one partner feel under the other partner’s control. These are all important issues to resolve before introducing oral sex into your relationship. 

All of this pressure women feel around our bodies affects our enjoyment of sex. It’s hard to be in the moment when you’re worried about your stomach looking flabby or ashamed of the way your genitals taste. There’s no way to understand what it’s like to be a woman if you aren’t one, but I bring up this issue because being sensitive about this can help men be better partners to women. Men aren’t responsible for making women feel more self-confident, but you can help her feel more comfortable in the moment. Tell her the specific things you love about her body. Compliment her during the most vulnerable moments, like when you’re taking off her clothes or moving down between her legs. Let her know that the way she tastes and smells turns you on.


Many STDs can be spread through oral sex. However, it is difficult to compare the exact risks of getting specific STDs from specific types of sexual activity. This is partly because most people who have oral sex also have vaginal or anal sex. Also, few studies have looked at the risks of getting STDs other than HIV from giving oral sex on the vagina or anus, compared to giving oral sex on the penis.
^ Jump up to: a b Bryan Strong; Christine DeVault; Theodore F. Cohen (2010). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationship in a Changing Society. Cengage Learning. p. 186. ISBN 0-534-62425-1. Retrieved October 8, 2011. Most people agree that we maintain virginity as long as we refrain from sexual (vaginal) intercourse. But occasionally we hear people speak of 'technical virginity' [...] Data indicate that 'a very significant proportion of teens ha[ve] had experience with oral sex, even if they haven't had sexual intercourse, and may think of themselves as virgins' [...] Other research, especially research looking into virginity loss, reports that 35% of virgins, defined as people who have never engaged in vaginal intercourse, have nonetheless engaged in one or more other forms of heterosexual sexual activity (e.g., oral sex, anal sex, or mutual masturbation).
Try this: Have your partner take his shirt off and lay on his stomach with his arms by his side. Hot tip: keep his pants on, but pull them down a few inches for a tantalizing never-nude experience ;). Lightly run your fingers and or anxiety-ravaged cuticles down across his lower back, stopping before you hit ass cheek. Do not pass ‘Go’, collect $200, or go past his crack. 

No two penises (or guys) are alike — which means that every man will have different specific turn-ons. Don't rely on tricks that you used on other penises in the past. Ask your partner what he likes while you're trying new things — more pressure? More suction? There's no better way to give him a mind-blowing O than to give him exactly what he likes.
Some men can have problems reaching orgasm. These most often stem from psychological factors; for example, they are still affected by a traumatic event or a restrictive upbringing, or they have fallen into masturbation patterns that could have conditioned the body to take longer to orgasm. However, the problem also can be caused by certain medications or by a neurological or cardiovascular disease, or by having surgery where nerves are cut, says Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark New Jersey, and past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
There is an increased risk of STI transmission if the receiving partner has wounds on his genitals, or if the giving partner has wounds or open sores on or in his or her mouth, or bleeding gums.[10][11][23] Brushing the teeth, flossing, undergoing dental work soon before or after giving fellatio can also increase the risk of transmission, because all of these activities can cause small scratches in the lining of the mouth.[10][11] These wounds, even when they are microscopic, increase the chances of contracting STIs that can be transmitted orally under these conditions.[10][11] Such contact can also lead to more mundane infections from common bacteria and viruses found in, around and secreted from the genital regions. Because of the aforementioned factors, medical sources advise the use of condoms or other effective barrier methods when performing or receiving fellatio with a partner whose STI status is unknown.[9][10][11][20]
Nancy Friday's book, Men in Love – Men's Sexual Fantasies: The Triumph of Love over Rage, suggests that swallowing semen is high on a man's intimacy scale.[17] The man receiving fellatio receives direct sexual stimulation, while his partner may derive satisfaction from giving him pleasure. Giving and receiving fellatio may happen simultaneously in sex positions like 69 and daisy chain.

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