The best thing about giving a partner the first blow job is then you can ask for, essentially, an oral sex performance review. All sex—penetrative, oral, etc.—tends to get better with a partner as you get to know each other better and communicate more. As you're comfortable, ask your partner what he likes in a blow job, or how you can craft a BJ perfect for him. And if he's polite, he'll ask the same of you. A true win-win.
Tanya's Deep-throat Manifesto, my co-author and friend Tanya J., a former adult film star, teaches you the ins and outs of deep-throating like a pro – killing your gag-reflex has never been this easy. Believe it or not – mastering the art of deep-throating is your one way ticket to a loving relationship. Once you go "all in" he'll never view you the same again. 

Other slang terms for oral sex include going down on (male or female), licking out and muff diving (female), blow job (male), dome (male or female), sucking off (male), playing the skin flute (male recipient), rolling cigars (male recipient), lolly-gagging (gay male-on-male), gaining knowledge (male recipient) and bust down (male). Forced fellatio is often called Egyptian rape or simply Egyptian; this goes back to the time of the Crusades when Mamluks were alleged to force their Christian captives to do this.[44]
"Depth is definitely a plus for some guys, and with his partner’s legs over his arms or shoulders, missionary becomes a deeper position. But the greatest number of nerve endings on the penis is around the coronal ridge, colloquially known as the cock head; for this kind of stimulation, more pressure or tightness is a good idea. Try the missionary variant where his partner crosses her legs to add more pressure,” 

The Magic Missionary is a twist on the regular missionary position that simultaneously stimulates both your and his hot buttons (he gets extremely firm and strong glans stimulation; you get close clitoral stimulation). "Both the man and woman's groin areas stay in constant contact in this position, which can be amazing for orgasms," says Paget. "The heat and sensation are never ending." Most important, the position is fabulous for inducing the sort of muscular contractions that can move mountains. Mattress-wise, it's not an energetic action, explains Paget, but it puts your bod in more pleasure-enhancing motions than the spread-eagle style because it lets you move and squeeze more to build arousal. Plus, your man will be using some of his strongest muscles — his thighs and glutes — so he'll endure like the Energizer Bunny.

Don’t be fooled by the term “oral sex” — your mouth doesn’t have to carry the full burden of her pleasure. “Your tongue is great, don’t get me wrong, but you’ve got two other tools at your disposal that can really help to bring her home: Your hands. You can easily bring your fingers into play while you give your mouth a break," says Morse. "And it doesn’t stop there: A lot of women really enjoy a bit of manual stimulation during cunnilingus,” says Morse. Doing so can even help her orgasm faster.
Dear Beloved Reader, we're going to be real with you. We're asking you to join our membership program so we can become fully financially sustainable (and you get some cool perks too!) With plummeting ad rates across the media industry, we're at an urgent risk of shutting down. And we don't want you to face Trump and his kind without the unique resources we provide. If everyone reading this only gave $12, we could raise enough money for the entire year in just one day. For the price of a single lunch out, you can help save us. We're an independent feminist media site, led entirely by people of color, and that pays everyone who writes for us. If Everyday Feminism has been useful to you, please take one minute to keep us publishing the articles you've come to rely on us for. Thank you! Click here to join! 

Some men can have problems reaching orgasm. These most often stem from psychological factors; for example, they are still affected by a traumatic event or a restrictive upbringing, or they have fallen into masturbation patterns that could have conditioned the body to take longer to orgasm. However, the problem also can be caused by certain medications or by a neurological or cardiovascular disease, or by having surgery where nerves are cut, says Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark New Jersey, and past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
Mare Simone, a certified Tantra educator, says that using your hot breath to stimulate nerve endings is an amazing way to ramp up foreplay before diving in. This works just as well with fellatio as it does with cunnilingus, too. Next time you’re going down on your partner, just take a step back to breathe on their sensitive parts before making contact. The suspense will turn them on in ways you didn’t know were possible.
As someone who was sexually abused throughout most of my childhood, I’ve been reluctant to give head because of the flashbacks. I’ve been reading your blog for a few days now, and I feel confident in knowing more techniques to try out on my partner that are 100% different from all that bad stuff. In the twelve years since I’ve escaped, I’ve never felt so confident to try this out with my partner, so THANK YOU! I’m sure he will enjoy it too!
There are a whole bunch of places on his body (besides the shaft of his penis!) that are supersensitive and can lead to a mind-blowing experience. For starters, work the area around his penis — his balls, obviously, the scrotum, and the perineum (that place between his balls and his butt). Feel free to let your hands roam over other sensitive areas around his body, too — like behind his knees, his butt, and his inner thighs.
Zoey's boyfriend got tired of constantly being on the receiving end of bad blowjobs so he took her to his mature Ex lover for hands on training. Zoey was eager to please her man, she followed every instruction and surpassed expectations. After slobbing on the knob, Zoey got fucked from behind while simultaneously getting her pretty little asshole licked. Her boyfriend and his Ex had their way with Zoey, they taught her a few valuable lessons that she'll never forget.
The show was described as depicting backstage burlesque and one reviewer called it the "queerest show you've ever seen" and as having "all the Queens" in it. Another review noted the presence of "Harlem bacchanales". A couple of favorable reviews found it entertaining, but most reviewers gave it rather scornful criticism including description of it as "filth" and "foul exhibitionism".[2]
^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and pages 47-49 for views on what constitutes virginity loss and therefore sexual intercourse or other sexual activity; source discusses how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in penile-vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
Fellatio (also known as fellation,[1] and in slang as blowjob, BJ, giving head, or sucking off[2]) is an oral sex act involving the use of the mouth or throat, which is usually performed by a person on the penis of another person. If performed on oneself, the act is called autofellatio.[3][4] Oral stimulation of the scrotum may also be termed fellatio,[5][6] or colloquially as teabagging.[7]

Follow up with your tongue, exploring the same terrain using slow wide strokes with your tongue. Don’t be afraid to use lots of saliva, as this natural lube feels great and helps create friction and suction. There are many sexually transmitted infections that can be passed during fellatio, using flavored condoms is a great way to practice safer sex and deal with any taste you may not like. It is also one way to help guys who say they have difficulty with condoms get used to, and excited about, using them.
So many men bemoan the fact that women don’t feel more comfortable with sex, but then they turn around and slut-shame women. The shaming of female sexuality is horrifyingly pervasive, and it has serious consequences. If you want women to have sex with you, you have to make it safe for them to actually do so. Don’t degrade women by calling them names, objectifying their bodies, or disrespecting their boundaries.
Lack Of Variation – An obvious, but often forgotten blow job “don’t” is a lack of variation. Just like performing the same tasks over and over at the office make for a dull, boring workday, this is also the case for your sex life. In fact studies have shown that while both men and women enjoy new sexual experiences, men have a higher preference for new and exciting sexual stimulation[8], so why not give it to him!
Once you’ve located the clitoris, you don’t want to immediately rush in. “Tease her with your mouth and hands to build anticipation and arousal. Kiss her softly around the clitoris, gently nibble on her inner thighs and take your time slowly pulling off her underwear,” says Morse. You can also heighten arousal by touching and kissing her through the fabric. Once you're dealing with bare skin, you can start with slow tongue motions. Moving slowly, lick up and down, with gentle strokes and a flat tongue. 
20. This is one thing that porn can actually teach you a lot about, like the graphic sex ed you never had in school. Sex ed should definitely be better in this country but I really doubt we'll ever have gym coaches teaching good blow job decorum in front of a bunch of confused teenagers. And that's probably for the best? Anyway. People don't fuck IRL like they do in porn, but sometimes those close-up shots of someone ferociously sucking a D can serve as good little tutorials on how to move your head. Just don't attempt deep-throating if you're not very experienced.
Option 3 is that you join over 30,000 Blowjob Queens that have benefited from my step-by-step program. Now they're enjoying loving and secure relationships with the man of their choice. They have more control over their love life and never have to worry about cheating, feeling sexually inadequate or worry if he's satisfied. And they don't have to wonder – they know exactly how to give killer blowjobs while feeling supremely confident, sexy and empowered – so they know it's the best blowjob of his life... and now you can too.
You can kiss his penis any way you want, but it will be a lot easier when you use your hand to hold it in place while you kiss it. There are multiple different ways to kiss his penis, from giving him small, quick ‘pecks’, to giving him longer, more intense kisses. He’ll especially love it if you give him extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don’t be surprised if you can see precum or semen dripping from his cock at this stage.

It sounds intimidating, but the payoff is worth it. "Glance up at him just as you're about to take his penis as far into your mouth as you can, then maintain eye contact for a few strokes or the entire time," says Kait Scalisi, sex educator and founder of PassionbyKait.com. “This move is super intimate, as extended eye contact causes a release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone, in both of you.”
But now the good news! Other people have literally already been there, done that, and can help you get over your own pre-BJ woes. Whether you're preparing for your first for thousandth blow job, there are always new lessons to be learned. Especially when it comes to dick-in-mouth. Here are 24 pieces of sage guidance that all grown women wish they'd known before giving their first blow jobs.

It doesn’t matter how memorable your oral skills may be — if your partner is distracted or stuck in her head, she is not going to be able to enjoy herself. “Oral sex offers an interesting paradox; many women love it yet it can find it so challenging to relax into the moment. This is why so many women tense up when their partner goes down," says Dr. Emily Morse, host of the Sex With Emily podcast and author of Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight. "The best thing you can say to a woman is, ‘Relax, I’ve got all night.' " Since women can worry about whether you want to be down there and may be self-conscious about how long it takes them to get off, a quick reassurance will go a long way.


Oral sex has been observed in the animal kingdom among many species.[46][47] It has been suggested that there is an evolutionary advantage due to the tendency of primates, non-primates and humans to have oral sex.[48] Oral sex, at least fellatio, also exists among the fruit bat, Cynopterus sphinx; it has been observed when the bats are mating. These bat pairs spend more time copulating if the female licks the male than if she does not.[45][49]
^ Ken Plummer (2002). Modern Homosexualities: Fragments of Lesbian and Gay Experiences. Routledge. pp. 1920–1921. ISBN 1134922426. Retrieved August 24, 2013. The social construction of 'sex' as vaginal intercourse affects how other forms of sexual activity are evaluated as sexually satisfying or arousing; in some cases whether an activity is seen as a sexual act at all. For example, unless a woman has been penetrated by a man's penis she is still technically a virgin even if she has had lots of sexual experience.
Plateau The male body prepares for orgasm in this phase, which can last from 30 seconds to 2 minutes. Muscle tension increases even more and involuntary body movements, particularly in the pelvis, begin to take over. The man's heart rate increases to between 150 and 175 beats per minute, says Ingber. A clear fluid may begin to flow from the urethra. This pre-ejaculatory fluid is meant to change the pH balance of the urethra, to improve the chances of sperm survival.
We all know the classic 69 position, but very few people can actually reach orgasm in this position. One of the greatest things about oral sex is taking turns. One person gets to totally relax and receive, and the other person can focus on giving as much pleasure as possible. 69 can be really distracting, and most people just end up moaning and gasping rather than focusing on giving. 

Try this: reverse finger job. Make two tight rings around his penis with your thumb and index finger (like you’re doing the okay hand symbol 👌), stacking them one on top of the other, in the middle of his shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of his shaft at the same time. Cox calls this a “torrid twist” the the typical one-handed uppy-downey handy. Remember to use lube, though!
Note: Certain things have been suggested to increase a person’s chances of getting HIV during oral sex, if exposed to an infected partner, such as having poor oral health, having bleeding gums or gum disease, having sores in the mouth or on the genitals, or being exposed to the “pre-cum” or “cum” (also known as pre-ejaculate or ejaculate) of an infected partner. However, no scientific studies have been done to show whether or not these factors actually do increase the risk of getting HIV or STI from oral sex.

There are a whole bunch of places on his body (besides the shaft of his penis!) that are supersensitive and can lead to a mind-blowing experience. For starters, work the area around his penis — his balls, obviously, the scrotum, and the perineum (that place between his balls and his butt). Feel free to let your hands roam over other sensitive areas around his body, too — like behind his knees, his butt, and his inner thighs.
If you are sexually active, you should get tested regularly for STDs and HIV and talk to your partner(s) about STDs. If you think you might have an STD, stop having sex and visit your doctor or clinic to get tested. There are free and low-cost options for testing in your area. It is important that you talk openly with your health care provider about any activities that might put you at risk for an STD, including oral sex.  
13. Your hands can pinch hit when your mouth needs some time on the bench. The average penis is 5.17 inches (when hard). I haven't measured the inside of my mouth, but I am pretty damn sure there aren't 5.17 inches of space between my lips and the back of my throat. And no way do I recommend going for broke and shoving a penis down your esophagus. Let your hands help. Put the tip in your mouth and your hands around the base, and voilà. This is within the acceptable rules of play.
If you have a comfortable recliner or reading chair, try putting a pillow on the floor in front of you, scooting to the edge of the chair and inviting your partner to kneel in front of you. This can also work on the edge of a bed. Inviting your lover to kneel in front of you and perform oral sex is a delicious way to allow them to worship your lovely body.
Mae West, wise-cracking vaudeville performer, was one of the most controversial figures of her era. Rarely, however, do people think of Mae West as a writer. In Three Plays By Mae West, Lillian Schlissel brings this underexplored part of West's career to the fore by offering for the first time in book form, three of the plays West wrote in the 1920s--Sex (1926), The Drag (1927) and Pleasure Man (1928). With an insightful introduction by Schlissel, this book offers a unique look into to the life and early career of this legendary stage and screen actress. 

If fellatio and/or cunnilingus become a regular part of your routine, either can seem ho hum after a while—just as any other sex act can get when it becomes your go-to pleasure move. Luckily there are many variations to cunnilingus and fellatio. If you’re in a rut, try it on all fours, up against the wall, or in the 69 position, for example. Just like with intercourse, experimenting with new positions may crank up your chances of orgasm.
I’m not really a head giver and but it’s only because I don’t really have any confidence in doing it. Now yesterday I came across your website on facebook and click on it. Once I read the tips that you have posted, I took heed to them. Now be and my bf have been together for 8yrs and when I give him a BJ it’s usually no longer than 5mins. but today I tried some things you’ve posted and he actually admitted to it that it was the best BJ that I have ever done and that it was the first time that I made his eye actually role to the back of his head. When he told me this it made me feel so good and happy inside like I actually knew what I was doing. His actual was were “Damn babe I didn’t know you had it in you like that, it actually felt like I was cumming but I knew I wasn’t.” My thing is what are other things that I can do to keep him like this in this shocking stage? I like to keep him guessing and always want to try new things when giving him a BJ just without him knowing what I’m going to do next. All I really want is to make him cum with just a BJ but he takes longer with those then him being inside of me, what are the key things that I need to do to put him on his a** to the point that he can’t believe what I just did to him. PLEASE HELP ME……BECOME A PRO

His Shaft: No, I’m not talking that empty space you can look out to from your bathroom window but rather his genitals. For something extra special, form two rings with your thumb and index fingers placing one at the end and one on the head and move them in opposite directions meeting in the middle. Start slow, go faster and slow down again, and close your eyes… a pinky eye is not becoming on anyone!


Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  
Oral sex is commonly used as a means of preserving virginity, especially among heterosexual pairings; this is sometimes termed technical virginity (which additionally includes anal sex, mutual masturbation and other non-penetrative sex acts, but excludes penile-vaginal sex).[12][13][14][37] The concept of "technical virginity" or sexual abstinence through oral sex is particularly popular among teenagers,[14][23][38] including with regard to teenage girls who not only fellate their boyfriends to preserve their virginities, but also to create and maintain intimacy or to avoid pregnancy.[14] Other reasons given for the practice among teenage girls are peer-group pressure and as their introduction to sexual activity.[14] Additionally, gay males may regard fellatio as a way of maintaining their virginities, with penile-anal penetration defined as resulting in virginity loss, while other gay males may define fellatio as their main form of sexual activity.[12][15]
×