Q: This is a rather general question, but I was wondering if you could write about how men can be good sexual partners for women. I have had several relationships end because the guy didn’t seem like he could be a partner in creating a healthy sex life. I know I’m not going to be sexually compatible with every guy I meet, but it seems like so many guys out there are selfish or disrespectful when it comes to sex.
Fellatio is legal in most countries. Laws of some jurisdictions regard fellatio as penetrative sex for the purposes of sexual offenses with regard to the act, but most countries do not have laws which ban the practice, in contrast to anal sex or extramarital sex. In Islamic literature, the only forms of sexual activity that are consistently explicitly prohibited within marriage are anal sex and sexual activity during menstrual cycles.[39] However, the exact attitude towards oral sex is a subject of disagreements between modern scholars of Islam. Authorities considering it "objectionable" do so because of the penis's supposedly impure fluids coming in contact with the mouth.[40] Others emphasize that there is no decisive evidence to forbid oral sex.[41]
17. You can use your tongue to trick him into thinking he's all the way in your mouth. Like ~magic~ if magic were perverted and used only to trick men into thinking you give the best blow jobs in the world. You don't have to just tuck your tongue away and hide it while this event is taking place. You can use it (like the roof of your mouth thing) to trick him into thinking he's basically pumping away into your stomach. Just either tuck his penis underneath your tongue, or use your tongue to block the back of your throat (this also protects your delicate gag reflexes just in case).

The sexy views of doggy style and (especially) reverse cowgirl can be great for ass men, who get to view (and touch) the ass as much as they like.  “When physical limitations do not intrude, there’s also a lot to be said for the excitement of lifting his partner up (legs around his waist for stability, and up against a wall for even more stability),” says Queen. 


Oral sex is common among sexually active adults. According to a national survey conducted from June 2006 through December 2008, over 80% of sexually active youth and adults ages 15-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. The same survey found that 45% or more of teenage girls and boys (ages 15-19 years) report having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
Try this: reverse finger job. Make two tight rings around his penis with your thumb and index finger (like you’re doing the okay hand symbol 👌), stacking them one on top of the other, in the middle of his shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of his shaft at the same time. Cox calls this a “torrid twist” the the typical one-handed uppy-downey handy. Remember to use lube, though!
Oral Herpes: You can transmit oral herpes to your partner's genital. In fact, HSV-1 (the type that causes cold sores) may be even more contagious than HSV-2 (the type associated with genital herpes). In general, performing oral sex on a woman is safer than performing oral sex on a man. However, herpes transmission in both directions is a real risk.
Schissel argues that West provided one of the first role models for women suggesting they could be independent and achieve success following through on their own ambitions. When a revival of Sex was mounted in Seattle in 1998, a review noted, "What dates this show more than all the quaint wink-and nod lewdness are a couple of incredibly racist lines that I'm glad they didn't cut. At one point, Margy LaMont tells a guy there's no way he could get himself a woman, at least not a white women. Later a character tells Margy that she could make good money whoring in Trinidad "'cause all the girls down there are half black."
For oral sex on a man, use a condom during oral sex. For oral sex on a woman, or when performing anilingus on a man or a woman, use a dam. A dam is a small thin latex or plastic square that acts as a barrier between the vagina or anus and the mouth. It may prevent the spread of STIs. You can buy dams at some sexual health clinics, online or at your pharmacy. 

Drive him wild: Many guys are heavily conditioned to focus solely on the genitals. "If you expand his capacity to have erotic experiences throughout his entire body, you can open up a whole other world of possibility for him," Michaels says. The thumb is actually a sexy spot for a lot of guys. "To suck on a man's thumb evokes sucking on something else, and can help him connect his mind and body during lovemaking. Start off foreplay by gazing into his eyes as you kiss his hands, and then suck on his thumb as a promise for what's to come," Michaels suggests.
Scene one opens with Terrill practicing one of his songs while touching up his makeup. Boys dressed as girls return to their dressing rooms, Bunny and Peaches are gossiping, and Chuck and Joe are teasing each other. Stanley comes in and Chuck tells him of his suspicions of Joe, but Stanley notices nothing. Dolores and Randall enter the dressing rooms still arguing about Terrill, while Terrill eaves drops. Arnold calls for Randall and as Randall leaves, Terrill slips a love note into the dressing room for Dolores. Dolores finishes reading the note for a third time when Terrill taps on Dolores's door. They show each other affection through the door until Otto and Stanley interrupt Terrill infuriated with him. The girls then start gossiping about guys and they begin to talk about the struggles between Dolores and Randall. Stanley and Terrill have a conversation about how Terrill gets all these girls to like him. Dolores then writes a note but hides it as Randall enters. Randall speaks of not wanting to lose Dolores. Lester arrives inviting everyone to Toto's big after-party as Arnold leaves to get gelatins. Arnold comes back and runs into Stanley and Terrill talking about girls Terrill has wooed. Arnold notices a picture of a girl that Terrill has been with and asks about her, but Terrill hardly remembers her. Arnold speaks to Steve about technical things and a call boy arrives saying there is a girl who wants to see Terrill. Mary Ann then comes in and tells Terrill that he must marry her. Terrill shoves her and she hits the stairway, screams, and faints. Paradise runs in and tries to help Mary Ann. Arnold then runs in and states who she is and helps as well. The rest of the girls crowd around and the scene closes with Paradise warning Dolores that she could be next. Scene two opens with Stanley interrogating Paradise. She tells him what she saw and Stanley then moves on to interrogate the hoofers. Terrill arrives from the stage and Paradise confronts him. Terrill threatens her but she doesn't back down so he leaves for his dressing room. Stanley tells Terrill he found a letter addressed to him, but doesn't know who it's from. Terrill lies saying it's probably from Flo. He then reads the letter. Meanwhile, the girls are calming Paradise down as she is extremely angry. She has a suspicion that Terrill was involved in Mary Ann's rough past, but she isn't going to ask questions because she fears her safety will be in danger. Terrill then meets with Dolores and they embrace. Randall comes and catches them together. He threatens Terrill's life and the curtain falls.
The thing is, I'm not your boyfriend and I don't have a reason to lie to you that your blowjobs are great when, in fact, you probably have no idea what you're doing. Even if you're "good" – that just doesn't cut it. You have no idea how mind-blowing your blowjobs can actually be. If don't ruin blowjobs for any other woman that ever puts her lips around him, then you're not doing a good job and you're not protecting your relationship.
If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.
Don’t be fooled by the term “oral sex” — your mouth doesn’t have to carry the full burden of her pleasure. “Your tongue is great, don’t get me wrong, but you’ve got two other tools at your disposal that can really help to bring her home: Your hands. You can easily bring your fingers into play while you give your mouth a break," says Morse. "And it doesn’t stop there: A lot of women really enjoy a bit of manual stimulation during cunnilingus,” says Morse. Doing so can even help her orgasm faster.
Symptoms: Often there are no symptoms. In the first or primary stage of infection, may have a single sore or multiple sores on mouth, throat, genitals, or anus. In the second stage, may have a skin rash (often on the palms of the hands and the soles of the feet, but also on other body parts). The symptoms of syphilis will disappear with or without treatment, but without treatment, the infection remains in the body and may cause organ damage.
You and your man will quickly realize why The Lusty Leapfrog has such climax potential: Hovering in a sexy squat above your man — rather than sitting or straddling him squarely — gives you the perfect chance to clench him tight. "This is one of the easiest positions in which to flex your PC muscles around the glans of his penis, which can initiate an intense orgasmic response," says Paget. This erotic arrangement also allows for better command of pacing and depth of thrusts (it's easy to vary between deep and shallow), which helps put you in control of your climax, says Kenneth Ray Stubbs, Ph.D., author of The Kama Sutra of Sexual Positions: The Tantric Art of Love. "Squatting will help you feel the entire length of his shaft as you encircle it, and the muscle tension created by holding yourself above him will really add to the intensity of your pleasure."
The Nipples: Bursting full of nerve endings, the nipples are always a great way to turn him on without actually giving him anything. After a good kiss, and before you go down on him, pause at the nipples and lick, suck and bite on them (very, very softly, please, I don’t want to end up in a court case named ‘Bitten-Off Nipple vs Buonasorte’). Also, don’t forget that there are two nipples and not just one. 

Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  
The other factor that makes a big difference to the potential risk of HIV transmission from oral sex is the viral load of the person living with HIV. Viral load is the term used to describe the amount of HIV in a sample of body fluid. People living with HIV have the viral load in their blood measured regularly, as part of routine health monitoring.
There’s lots of ways to make always-great sex even greater, and there are some specific sex positions that, when explored, can lead to extra excitement. There are various ways to look at what a specifically male pleasure position may mean to you — for starters, though, it should be one that gives greater than average physical pleasure or one that’s especially exciting. From there, the possibilities are endless, but here are some great ways to get started! 


It's no secret that women have some very specific pleasure points on their body, and hopefully, your guy is no stranger to the clitoris and G-spot. Yet you might be surprised to know that the male body also has particular erogenous zones, or trigger spots, that—when stimulated—will make his orgasms more powerful and your sex life better than ever. "Orgasm is the release of sexual tension, and tension is created through gradually increasing and varying touch and pressure on his passion points," says Claire Cavanah, cofounder of Babeland, a national chain of women-owned sex shops, and coauthor of Moregasm: Babeland's Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex and Sex Toys 101. "Licking and biting with your mouth, then adding in heat or cold sensations by sucking on an ice cube or drinking hot tea will drive him wild." To find out where to touch him to make his toes curl, click through our hot list. (Related: The 4 Simple Things You Need for Amazing Sex) 

While there's no male equivalent for the queening position, men deserve to feel like royalty, too. Receiving oral sex while seated in a comfortable chair, his lover kneeling in front of him, is perhaps the closest men can feel to sitting on a throne. Make it even more special by allowing him to watch a sports game, porn or another video of choice. Or put a special drink in his hand, or light a cigar before going down.
Receiving oral sex while standing up opens up a few great pleasure benefits. Most importantly, the giver uses their hands to add more stimulation to oral sex. Using hand job techniques during oral sex allows complete stimulation of the entire penis while taking the pressure off the giver to take the entire length of their lover's shaft into their mouth.
If you have a comfortable recliner or reading chair, try putting a pillow on the floor in front of you, scooting to the edge of the chair and inviting your partner to kneel in front of you. This can also work on the edge of a bed. Inviting your lover to kneel in front of you and perform oral sex is a delicious way to allow them to worship your lovely body.
Mare Simone, a certified Tantra educator, says that using your hot breath to stimulate nerve endings is an amazing way to ramp up foreplay before diving in. This works just as well with fellatio as it does with cunnilingus, too. Next time you’re going down on your partner, just take a step back to breathe on their sensitive parts before making contact. The suspense will turn them on in ways you didn’t know were possible.
If you are living with HIV, there is a higher risk of passing on HIV through someone performing oral sex on you, if you are not taking treatment and if you also have an untreated sexually transmitted infection. If you don't have HIV and you are performing oral sex on someone who does have HIV, you are at more risk of acquiring HIV if you have cuts, sores or abrasions in your mouth or on your gums. There is also more risk if you have an infection in your throat or mouth which is causing inflammation.
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The surest way to not get a sexually transmitted infection from oral sex is to abstain from vaginal, anal, and oral sex or to be in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship with a partner who has been tested and is known to be uninfected. However, many infected persons may be unaware of their infection because STIs often have no symptoms and are unrecognized.

Now don't get me wrong I love giving head I always have but it's very discouraging when you can't make your own husband cum! He is in the military and left for training for a couple weeks and I wanted to do something nice for him when he got home so I bought your book. My attitude has been shit for the past couple years because I've been so frustrated and I really worked on that and I think I did a pretty damn good job! When he came home I tried out your advice and not only did he cum he said it was the best head he's ever gotten and he said his orgasm was deeper and more intense than its ever been! I also had a lot of fun and enjoyed making him feel so good. So just wanted to say thanks, it really helped!
9. It isn't a fancy massage at a spa and therefore doesn't have to be all about him. You ever heard of something called "sensate focus?" It's a sex therapy technique in which you focus on touch and the physical pleasure it brings you, and you can totally use it to ease blow job-anxiety or just ~mix it up~ a little. Basically. instead of doing what you think you're supposed to do to make him feel great, employ blow job techniques that feel fun 'n exciting to you. Oral sex doesn't have to be as one-sided as its reputation says it should be.
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how men can be better sexual partners to women.
Getting HIV from oral sex may be less likely than vaginal or anal sex, but it still carries risk. If you are having oral sex you should still protect yourself. Repeated unprotected oral sex exposure to HIV may represent a considerable risk for spread of HIV, as well as other STDs for which the risk of spread through oral sex has not been as well studied. 

It doesn’t matter how memorable your oral skills may be — if your partner is distracted or stuck in her head, she is not going to be able to enjoy herself. “Oral sex offers an interesting paradox; many women love it yet it can find it so challenging to relax into the moment. This is why so many women tense up when their partner goes down," says Dr. Emily Morse, host of the Sex With Emily podcast and author of Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight. "The best thing you can say to a woman is, ‘Relax, I’ve got all night.' " Since women can worry about whether you want to be down there and may be self-conscious about how long it takes them to get off, a quick reassurance will go a long way.
My Special Advanced Edition is NOT for beginners. This is what takes your already good blowjob skills to the next level – it's like having a PhD in Blowjobology. Even the most skilled porn stars and professionals have a thing or two to learn here. I was a bit reluctant to release this to the public as it can give women an unfair advantage over other women (and have her steal a man under another woman's nose) – please use these skills in an ethical manner.
Oral Herpes: You can transmit oral herpes to your partner's genital. In fact, HSV-1 (the type that causes cold sores) may be even more contagious than HSV-2 (the type associated with genital herpes). In general, performing oral sex on a woman is safer than performing oral sex on a man. However, herpes transmission in both directions is a real risk.
The dentist’s chair may seem like the last place you should be getting quizzed about your sex life, but some doctors think that should change. In an article published in January 2018 in the Journal of the American Dental Association, a group of physicians argued that dentists are in a unique position to screen for and speak with their patients about HPV-related cancers and the risks of unprotected oral sex.
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On the following pages, we identify the nooky positions that will increase your likelihood of having the best climax of your life. Some focus chiefly on your clitoris, others are great for G-spot gratification and still others are extraordinary for emotional intimacy — a climax clincher for many women. But with all of them, the secrets are in the subtleties. "I don't care if you're baking a cake, racing a car or making love," says Lou Paget, best-selling author of The Big O. "It's your attention to detail that takes it from so-so to over-the-top sensational." Hands down (and pants too), you'll find that these body bounces will push your buttons like never, ever before.
Oral sex is often regarded as taboo,[1] but most countries do not have laws which ban the practice. Commonly, people do not regard oral sex as affecting the virginity of either partner, though opinions on the matter vary.[7][8][9][10] People may also have negative feelings or sexual inhibitions about giving or receiving oral sex, or may flatly refuse to engage in the practice.[1] 

Believe it or not, sex can be more amazing for you just by slowing down. Amp up your orgasm by letting yourself get to the edge, slowing down and pausing, and then starting up again. And don’ t forget to breathe. Breathing naturally will speed up when we are about to orgasm. By letting yourself slow down and just simply breathe, you’ll control our orgasm. That’ll ultimately make it even stronger. 

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