We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how men can be better sexual partners to women.
Hey Jack, i had so much fun reading the book ! bad timing getting it during exam week ! i barely studied ! lol , and even read it at the job ! ( call center, not so bad ahahah ) well, totally worth it ! He even told me '' i dont think its healthy for me to cum that hard '' you made me proud of my blow jobs ! I never had problem with the passion part, in fact , before i felt like i enoyed giving him head more then he liked receiving it !! So a lot of the techniques were good for me. thanks again !
When I first read your book I had never given a bj and I was extremely nervous and I had no idea what to do. Your advice helped me soooooo much I was so confident. My boyfriend actually asked if I was lying to him when I told him he was the first. None of the other stuff about this I found were as encouraging as yours and I couldn't belive how excited I was to give head. Now I do it all the time for my boyfriend and he adores me for it! One time I even did it while he was driving he loved it! Anyway I just wanted to thank you. Honestly your advice was so much help I you helped strengthen my relationship! Any girl who gives head, whether they are a beginer or a pro, they should check your book out. Thanks again!
How to find it: The sacrum is the triangular bone located at the base of his spine in between his hips (think: the small of his back). There are nerves in the sacrum that are linked to the genitals, so stimulating these nerves can send sensations to his manly parts. In fact, some studies show that electrical stimulation of these nerves can trigger orgasm.
Lack Of Variation – An obvious, but often forgotten blow job “don’t” is a lack of variation. Just like performing the same tasks over and over at the office make for a dull, boring workday, this is also the case for your sex life. In fact studies have shown that while both men and women enjoy new sexual experiences, men have a higher preference for new and exciting sexual stimulation[8], so why not give it to him!
The chance an HIV-negative person will get HIV from oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is extremely low. However, it is hard to know the exact risk because a lot of people who have oral sex also have anal or vaginal sex. The type of oral sex that may be the riskiest is mouth-to-penis oral sex. But the risk is still very low, and much lower than with anal or vaginal sex.
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People give various reasons for their dislike of oral sex.[1] Some state that since it does not result in reproduction, it is therefore unnatural.[37] Others find it less intimate because it is not a face-to-face practice,[1] or believe that it is a humiliating or unclean practice;[1][38] that it is humiliating or unclean are opinions that are, at least in some cases, connected with the symbolism attached to different parts of the body.[38] Opposite these views, people also believe that oral sex "is one of the most intimate behaviors that a couple can engage in because it requires total trust and vulnerability."[1]
Try this: Overstreet suggests kissing your partner across his shoulder, up his neck, and stopping right before you hit his ear. Do this to both sides, because asymmetry is for the lazy. When he’s right about to lose it, start kissing his earlobe, and use your tongue to bring his earlobe into your mouth. Play around with gentle nibbles, tongue, etc. Be careful not to touch any other part of his body while doing this and see how wild he gets from you just touching his earlobes.

It sounds intimidating, but the payoff is worth it. "Glance up at him just as you're about to take his penis as far into your mouth as you can, then maintain eye contact for a few strokes or the entire time," says Kait Scalisi, sex educator and founder of PassionbyKait.com. “This move is super intimate, as extended eye contact causes a release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone, in both of you.”
The fuel for the process leading to orgasm is testosterone, a hormone produced in steady supply by the testicles. The testicles also make millions of sperm each day, which mature and then are mixed with whitish, protein-rich fluids. These fluids nourish and support the sperm so they can live after ejaculation for a limited time. This mixture of fluid and sperm, known as semen, is what is moved through the urethra and out the penis during orgasm. 

The dentist’s chair may seem like the last place you should be getting quizzed about your sex life, but some doctors think that should change. In an article published in January 2018 in the Journal of the American Dental Association, a group of physicians argued that dentists are in a unique position to screen for and speak with their patients about HPV-related cancers and the risks of unprotected oral sex.
While there's no male equivalent for the queening position, men deserve to feel like royalty, too. Receiving oral sex while seated in a comfortable chair, his lover kneeling in front of him, is perhaps the closest men can feel to sitting on a throne. Make it even more special by allowing him to watch a sports game, porn or another video of choice. Or put a special drink in his hand, or light a cigar before going down.
The Pleasure Man was put on trial 2 years after the premiere, charging the company for "sex, degeneracy, and sex perversion". The trial was riddled with homophobia, chastising the “degenerates” that they saw on the stage, and asking if their manners of female impersonation carried on off stage. The jury failed to reach a decision and the charges were dismissed. West never appeared in court and was fined $60,000[1]
^ Ken Plummer (2002). Modern Homosexualities: Fragments of Lesbian and Gay Experiences. Routledge. pp. 1920–1921. ISBN 1134922426. Retrieved August 24, 2013. The social construction of 'sex' as vaginal intercourse affects how other forms of sexual activity are evaluated as sexually satisfying or arousing; in some cases whether an activity is seen as a sexual act at all. For example, unless a woman has been penetrated by a man's penis she is still technically a virgin even if she has had lots of sexual experience.
The chance an HIV-negative person will get HIV from oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is extremely low. However, it is hard to know the exact risk because a lot of people who have oral sex also have anal or vaginal sex. The type of oral sex that may be the riskiest is mouth-to-penis oral sex. But the risk is still very low, and much lower than with anal or vaginal sex.

Option 2 is that you keep reading Cosmo and similar women's magazines, or listen to your "more experienced" girlfriends that are "sexperts" when it comes to men and blowjobs. How far did listening to them get you? Sure, you can learn a thing or two, but you have access to the exact same basic information all other women do as well. It doesn't make you special. And most guys laugh out loud when they see what kind of BS advice women get. Of course guys get turned off.

Fellatio is sometimes practiced when penile penetration would create a physical difficulty for a sex partner. For example, it may be practiced during pregnancy instead of vaginal intercourse by couples wishing to engage in intimate sexual activity while avoiding the difficulty of vaginal intercourse during later stages of pregnancy.[18] There may be other reasons why a woman may not wish to have vaginal intercourse, such as apprehension of losing her virginity, of becoming pregnant,[12][14] or she may be menstruating.


Chlamydia, human papillomavirus (HPV), gonorrhea, herpes, hepatitis (multiple strains), and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs), can be transmitted through oral sex.[4][5][26] Any sexual exchange of bodily fluids with a person infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, poses a risk of infection. Risk of STI infection, however, is generally considered significantly lower for oral sex than for vaginal or anal sex, with HIV transmission considered the lowest risk with regard to oral sex.[5][6][27][28]

Positions that tend to allow men full control of penetration (this can mean depth, rhythm, etc.) tend to give men more pleasure. “This typically means that rear-entry positions allow for the most access as he is in control and her body allows deeper penetration in these positions, whether it's doggy style or some other variation,” says Dr. Kat Van Kirk, a licensed marriage and sex therapist and resident sex expert for www.AdamandEve.com. 
Links have been reported between oral sex and oral cancer with human papillomavirus (HPV)-infected people. In 2005, a research study at Malmö University's Faculty of Odontology suggested that performing unprotected oral sex on a person infected with HPV might increase the risk of oral cancer. The study found that 36 percent of the cancer patients had HPV compared to only 1 percent of the healthy control group.
Drive him wild: Many guys are heavily conditioned to focus solely on the genitals. "If you expand his capacity to have erotic experiences throughout his entire body, you can open up a whole other world of possibility for him," Michaels says. The thumb is actually a sexy spot for a lot of guys. "To suck on a man's thumb evokes sucking on something else, and can help him connect his mind and body during lovemaking. Start off foreplay by gazing into his eyes as you kiss his hands, and then suck on his thumb as a promise for what's to come," Michaels suggests.
There’s lots of ways to make always-great sex even greater, and there are some specific sex positions that, when explored, can lead to extra excitement. There are various ways to look at what a specifically male pleasure position may mean to you — for starters, though, it should be one that gives greater than average physical pleasure or one that’s especially exciting. From there, the possibilities are endless, but here are some great ways to get started! 

Receiving oral sex while standing up opens up a few great pleasure benefits. Most importantly, the giver uses their hands to add more stimulation to oral sex. Using hand job techniques during oral sex allows complete stimulation of the entire penis while taking the pressure off the giver to take the entire length of their lover's shaft into their mouth.
Many STDs can be spread through oral sex. However, it is difficult to compare the exact risks of getting specific STDs from specific types of sexual activity. This is partly because most people who have oral sex also have vaginal or anal sex. Also, few studies have looked at the risks of getting STDs other than HIV from giving oral sex on the vagina or anus, compared to giving oral sex on the penis.
Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  
Your hands are sensitive, dexterous, and capable of giving your man intense pleasure and powerful climaxes. With a little skill and confidence, you can fully satisfy your man and leave him feeling saturated with pleasure. Let's face it, sometimes the idea of intercourse or oral sex is too much. But you may be turned on enough to kiss, cuddle, and give your man a fabulous orgasm with your hands!
Really, this happens. In a recent BMJ case report, dentists detailed how a patient who regularly performed oral sex on men developed a strange lesion on the roof of his mouth, due to “blunt trauma” during fellatio. The sucking motion associated with fellatio may have also played a role, the authors wrote, causing blood to pool and clot in this area.
While male nipples are basically the same as human nipples, they might even be more sensitive than yours since guys aren’t used to having them touched so often. "For a lot of men, their nipples are uncharted territory — an erogenous zone they haven't experimented with," explains Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles-based clinical sexologist and author of the The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage. Touch them, however, and you'll send shock waves of pleasure radiating through him, she adds.
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