Well since reading your book. Our love has connected us, on many levels, I would of never believed it without seeing it with my own eyes, my husband is "in love" with me. He loves the new me, I send him little text messages, and he get's arroused, and so do I just thinking about, being with him. We actually feel as though we are having a affair with each other, because the things we are doing and saying, would under normal circumstances, would never happen. I feel young again, and like I am in love for the first time.
Note: Certain things have been suggested to increase a person’s chances of getting HIV during oral sex, if exposed to an infected partner, such as having poor oral health, having bleeding gums or gum disease, having sores in the mouth or on the genitals, or being exposed to the “pre-cum” or “cum” (also known as pre-ejaculate or ejaculate) of an infected partner. However, no scientific studies have been done to show whether or not these factors actually do increase the risk of getting HIV or STI from oral sex.
Hand Massage – This one is probably the easiest to get right. While you are kissing him or just talking to him or while you’re just physically close to him, put your hand on his crotch. So your hand should be resting on his briefs or his trousers. To make it smooth, start by first placing your hand on his leg and moving it up from there. Then just softly start massaging his penis and testicles outside of his trousers/briefs.
Bacterial vaginosis (vaginal inflammation caused by bacterial overgrowth) is easily spread from woman to woman, but HIV/AIDS is much less likely to be passed on this way, for example. If you’re a lesbian or bisexual woman who has had sex with men, you’re more at risk of the full range of STIs. Talk to your doctor about testing if you’re concerned you may be at risk.
If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.
Books are an easy way to jump-start your own sex ed. The Big Bang by Nerve is a great entry-level primer to all things sex. She Comes First by Ian Kerner is an incredible book about refining your oral sex technique. Check out some books about sex positions or female orgasm. These are all fun topics to brush up on, so this shouldn’t ever feel like a chore!
It is possible that getting certain STDs, such as chlamydia or gonorrhea, in the throat may not pose as great a threat to an infected person’s health as getting an STD in the genital area or rectum. Having these infections in the throat might increase the risk of getting HIV. Having gonorrhea in the throat also may lead to spread of the disease throughout the body. In addition:
When Lillian Schissel edited "Three Plays by Mae West,' published in 1997, it marked the first time Sex, The Drag and The Pleasure Man had ever been printed. Long thought to be lost, the original manuscripts gathered dust at the Library of Congress. After prolonged legal wrangling with the Roger Richman Agency of Los Angeles, who at the time represented the Mae West receivership estate, a deal was finally struck to have the plays finally published.
Perhaps the most important aspect of Schlissel's sleuthing is that excerpts from West's obscenity trial and disturbingly the censor's accusations sound as troubling today as they did 80 years ago. The arguments used 80 years ago to ban Mae West's bon mots are not unlike those used today to bar gay and lesbian artists from public funding and public self-expression.
Fellatio is legal in most countries. Laws of some jurisdictions regard fellatio as penetrative sex for the purposes of sexual offenses with regard to the act, but most countries do not have laws which ban the practice, in contrast to anal sex or extramarital sex. In Islamic literature, the only forms of sexual activity that are consistently explicitly prohibited within marriage are anal sex and sexual activity during menstrual cycles. However, the exact attitude towards oral sex is a subject of disagreements between modern scholars of Islam. Authorities considering it "objectionable" do so because of the penis's supposedly impure fluids coming in contact with the mouth. Others emphasize that there is no decisive evidence to forbid oral sex.
Positions that tend to allow men full control of penetration (this can mean depth, rhythm, etc.) tend to give men more pleasure. “This typically means that rear-entry positions allow for the most access as he is in control and her body allows deeper penetration in these positions, whether it's doggy style or some other variation,” says Dr. Kat Van Kirk, a licensed marriage and sex therapist and resident sex expert for www.AdamandEve.com.
Plateau The male body prepares for orgasm in this phase, which can last from 30 seconds to 2 minutes. Muscle tension increases even more and involuntary body movements, particularly in the pelvis, begin to take over. The man's heart rate increases to between 150 and 175 beats per minute, says Ingber. A clear fluid may begin to flow from the urethra. This pre-ejaculatory fluid is meant to change the pH balance of the urethra, to improve the chances of sperm survival.
The orgasmic advantage of the Canine Coupling (a special version of doggie-style) is that it directs intense, firm pressure from your man's member to your G-spot; pressure so pointed, in fact, that Stubbs says it's "one of the only positions where the penis is touching the G-spot like a bull's-eye. It's a direct hit." Says Paget, "It's primal. This is how animals do it. So when people want to connect with their raw, unbridled, passionate sexuality, they often look to this position." Then there's the erotic incognito element: The fact that neither of you are able to see the other's face can lead to lower self-consciousness and higher pleasure-consciousness. "When you're not able to use your visual sense, you rely on your senses of touch, sound and smell, which allow you to let go and pay attention to the sensations that will help lead you to climax," explains Paget.
Using your hands first, gently caress his inner thighs, penis, scrotum, testicles, and perineum, paying attention to his reactions (verbal and facial) as you touch certain spots. Many men who have sensitivity in their penis are particularly sensitive around the head (known as the glans), especially the frenulum, an indentation between the glans and the shaft on the underside of the penis. You might want to brush up on your knowledge of male sexual anatomy, to know what you’re working with.
To Control – Using sex as a weapon and method for controlling your man is a recipe for disaster. If you start withholding sex to try to get your husband to do something, then both of you are going to develop a negative attitude towards all things sex very quickly. Equally, promising to give him a blow job only if he does this or that is going to foster an unhealthy situation for your sex life.
Drive him wild: Have your man lie on his stomach and give him a massage by doing light, karate-chop type movements along his sacrum. "Doing this not only stimulates those sacral nerves, but also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which is key for relaxing, letting go, and having an orgasm," Michaels says. (Related: 7 Tips for a Better Orgasm)
Chlamydia, human papillomavirus (HPV), gonorrhea, herpes, hepatitis (multiple strains), and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs/STDs), can be transmitted through oral sex. Any sexual exchange of bodily fluids with a person infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, poses a risk of infection. Risk of STI infection, however, is generally considered significantly lower for oral sex than for vaginal or anal sex, with HIV transmission considered the lowest risk with regard to oral sex.
The fuel for the process leading to orgasm is testosterone, a hormone produced in steady supply by the testicles. The testicles also make millions of sperm each day, which mature and then are mixed with whitish, protein-rich fluids. These fluids nourish and support the sperm so they can live after ejaculation for a limited time. This mixture of fluid and sperm, known as semen, is what is moved through the urethra and out the penis during orgasm.
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Experts say the risk of contracting HIV/AIDS from an HIV-positive person during oral sex is extremely low, but it’s difficult to know exactly because people often participate in vaginal or anal sex at the same time as oral sex (which, when unprotected, both offer a much greater risk than oral sex). The form of oral sex posing the greatest risk is mouth-to-penis oral sex.
The sexy views of doggy style and (especially) reverse cowgirl can be great for ass men, who get to view (and touch) the ass as much as they like. “When physical limitations do not intrude, there’s also a lot to be said for the excitement of lifting his partner up (legs around his waist for stability, and up against a wall for even more stability),” says Queen. â€¨
I have no idea really how to be sexy. I have no imagination when it comes to sex. My husband is a freak and wants to do new things. Things I don’t really care to do but I do them because he likes it. Tried the three some thing. Hated it refuse to do it again. Just the thought of him with another woman irritates me. I’m simple. My wants and desires are simple. I just want to be wanted. Is there something wrong with me if I have no desire to not explore new things ? How do I get out of that feeling? He expects me to come up with new things and I truly don’t know what else to do. Right now we are exploring dildos and strap ons. This also made me read about blow jobs. I’m not very good at it and he’s made that clear. I gag if it goes too deep I gag if there’s just a hint of cum. He asks me if I like certain things I say yes because I know it turns him on when I really don’t like it. Any advice for the non sexual person?
An intensely pleasurable blow job tip that you can use on him is to use the tip of your tongue to apply a gentle flicking motion to it. While you are naturally going to stimulate his frenulum while sucking him (learn tips on sucking here and here) or just licking his penis (learn some oral sex licking techniques here), this technique is different as you will be focusing all your stimulation on a very specific point on his penis.
How to find it: "Men have a relatively higher concentration of nerve endings in the soles of their feet than women do," says Mark Michaels, coauthor of Partners in Passion: A Guide to Great Sex, Emotional Intimacy, and Long-Term Love. "There is an acupressure point about one-third of the way down from the third toe, right in front of the arch in the center of the foot." Nicknamed the "bubbling spring," pressing on this point may boost blood flow throughout the body, getting him all hot and bothered.
A: Thanks for your question! I love talking about the nitty-gritty, but I welcome the opportunity to talk about larger topics, too. I’m all about creating a more sex-positive world, and it’s important to talk about how we can all contribute to that. Of course, I have to give the caveat that not all men approach sex the same way. That being said, there are some broad patterns I have noticed in my work with men and straight couples.