On the other hand, you don’t want to get so invested in making her feel good that you wind up pressuring her to orgasm. It’s great to want to make her orgasm, but don’t make her feel like she needs to orgasm. Many women are sensitive to feeling pressured in the bedroom, but orgasm is impossible when it feels like an expectation. Her pleasure should be important to you simply because you want her to feel good, not because you want to boost your ego.
If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.
How to find it: The sacrum is the triangular bone located at the base of his spine in between his hips (think: the small of his back). There are nerves in the sacrum that are linked to the genitals, so stimulating these nerves can send sensations to his manly parts. In fact, some studies show that electrical stimulation of these nerves can trigger orgasm.
Don’t be fooled by the term “oral sex” — your mouth doesn’t have to carry the full burden of her pleasure. “Your tongue is great, don’t get me wrong, but you’ve got two other tools at your disposal that can really help to bring her home: Your hands. You can easily bring your fingers into play while you give your mouth a break," says Morse. "And it doesn’t stop there: A lot of women really enjoy a bit of manual stimulation during cunnilingus,” says Morse. Doing so can even help her orgasm faster.

But now the good news! Other people have literally already been there, done that, and can help you get over your own pre-BJ woes. Whether you're preparing for your first for thousandth blow job, there are always new lessons to be learned. Especially when it comes to dick-in-mouth. Here are 24 pieces of sage guidance that all grown women wish they'd known before giving their first blow jobs.


Some men can have problems reaching orgasm. These most often stem from psychological factors; for example, they are still affected by a traumatic event or a restrictive upbringing, or they have fallen into masturbation patterns that could have conditioned the body to take longer to orgasm. However, the problem also can be caused by certain medications or by a neurological or cardiovascular disease, or by having surgery where nerves are cut, says Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark New Jersey, and past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
Drive him wild: Have your man lie on his stomach and give him a massage by doing light, karate-chop type movements along his sacrum. "Doing this not only stimulates those sacral nerves, but also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which is key for relaxing, letting go, and having an orgasm," Michaels says. (Related: 7 Tips for a Better Orgasm)
Q: This is a rather general question, but I was wondering if you could write about how men can be good sexual partners for women. I have had several relationships end because the guy didn’t seem like he could be a partner in creating a healthy sex life. I know I’m not going to be sexually compatible with every guy I meet, but it seems like so many guys out there are selfish or disrespectful when it comes to sex.
While male nipples are basically the same as human nipples, they might even be more sensitive than yours since guys aren’t used to having them touched so often. "For a lot of men, their nipples are uncharted territory — an erogenous zone they haven't experimented with," explains Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles-based clinical sexologist and author of the The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage. Touch them, however, and you'll send shock waves of pleasure radiating through him, she adds. 

Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  

Bacterial vaginosis (vaginal inflammation caused by bacterial overgrowth) is easily spread from woman to woman, but HIV/AIDS is much less likely to be passed on this way, for example. If you’re a lesbian or bisexual woman who has had sex with men, you’re more at risk of the full range of STIs. Talk to your doctor about testing if you’re concerned you may be at risk.

"The key is to breathe in through your mouth and out through your nose. If you can learn circular breathing (something musicians who play instruments that require breath know), you can go down on a girl for hours without having to come up for air. It's actually reverse circular breathing. To make sure your tongue doesn't cramp up, keep your jaw comfortably open and loose. I've found that upward strokes under the clitoral hood where the clitoris is are one of the best motions."
Sexually active individuals should get tested regularly for STIs and HIV, and talk to all partner(s) about STIs. Anyone who thinks that he/she might have an STI should stop having sex and visit a doctor or clinic to get tested. There are free and low-cost options for testing available. It is important to talk openly with a health care provider about any activities that might put a person at risk for an STI, including oral sex.
His Shaft: No, I’m not talking that empty space you can look out to from your bathroom window but rather his genitals. For something extra special, form two rings with your thumb and index fingers placing one at the end and one on the head and move them in opposite directions meeting in the middle. Start slow, go faster and slow down again, and close your eyes… a pinky eye is not becoming on anyone!
Resolution and refraction After ejaculation, the penis begins to lose its erection. About half of the erection is lost immediately, and the rest fades soon after. Muscle tension fades, and the man may feel relaxed or drowsy, according to Ingber. Men usually must undergo a refractory period, or recovery phase, during which they cannot achieve another erection. This period is variable in men, says Ingber. In an 18-year-old, this is typically less than 15 minutes. In elderly men, it can be up to 10 to 20 hours. The average refractory period is about half an hour. Men differ from women in that men usually are satiated after one orgasm. Women can experience more than one orgasm with no loss of sexual arousal, and do not have to undergo a refractory period.
Treatment: There is no cure for HPV infection, but 90% of persons clear the infection within 2 years. Genital warts can be removed through different methods, including freezing. Appropriate follow-up and treatment for genital and rectal HPV infections (detected by abnormal Pap smear and/or HPV test results) is essential for cancer prevention and detection.
Now don't get me wrong I love giving head I always have but it's very discouraging when you can't make your own husband cum! He is in the military and left for training for a couple weeks and I wanted to do something nice for him when he got home so I bought your book. My attitude has been shit for the past couple years because I've been so frustrated and I really worked on that and I think I did a pretty damn good job! When he came home I tried out your advice and not only did he cum he said it was the best head he's ever gotten and he said his orgasm was deeper and more intense than its ever been! I also had a lot of fun and enjoyed making him feel so good. So just wanted to say thanks, it really helped!
You can kiss his penis any way you want, but it will be a lot easier when you use your hand to hold it in place while you kiss it. There are multiple different ways to kiss his penis, from giving him small, quick ‘pecks’, to giving him longer, more intense kisses. He’ll especially love it if you give him extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don’t be surprised if you can see precum or semen dripping from his cock at this stage.
There is an increased risk of STI transmission if the receiving partner has wounds on his or her genitals, or if the giving partner has wounds or open sores on or in his or her mouth, or bleeding gums.[5][6][13] Brushing the teeth, flossing, undergoing dental work soon before or after performing oral sex can also increase the risk of transmission, because all of these activities can cause small scratches in the lining of the mouth.[5][6] These wounds, even when they are microscopic, increase the chances of contracting STIs that can be transmitted orally under these conditions.[5][6] Such contact can also lead to more mundane infections from common bacteria and viruses found in, around and secreted from the genital regions. Because of the aforementioned factors, medical sources advise the use of condoms or other effective barrier methods when performing or receiving oral sex with a partner whose STI status is unknown.[4][5][6][26]
The first scene of the third act opens in Toto's apartment for the party. Some boys are making small talk and Stanley, Bill and Chuck talk about the party. Toto shows up and mentions how happy he is that everyone came to his party. Terrill and Dolores arrive together and Stanley greets them. He asks where Randall is, but Terrill quickly changes the subject. The doorbell then rings and Randall barges in drunk asking where Dolores is. Toto and Stanley insist that she isn't at the party and they get him to leave quietly ending scene one. Scene two opens with the chief of police interrogating Steve about the murder of Terrill. Steve mentions the confrontation between Randall and Terrill at the theatre when Randall caught Terrill with Dolores. The chief then asks Toto why he threw the party and if Terrill was around. Toto mentions that Terrill was with Dolores the whole time. The chief then interrogates Dolores about Terrill and where her husband was. She mentions that she couldn't help but fall for Terrill and she did not see her husband at the party. Paradise brings up the fact that he showed up drunk. Randall does not remember anything after he left the party and Stanley argues that Terrill deserved to be killed. The chief arrests Randall. Paradise states that Terrill deserved his death after he struck down Mary Ann, which is revealed to be Ted Arnold's sister. The chief asks who Arnold is. Stanley tells him and just as the chief states the report of Randall's arrest, an officer arrives with Arnold in handcuffs stating that they found the killer. Arnold then states that he saw his sister's picture in Terrill's dressing room and knew that Terrill had been using her and found out that Terrill was the one who struck her earlier. He says that he did not want to kill him, just torture him. He had attempted to perform a surgery on Terrill that they would do on rats and other creatures in college "so that they could never propagate their own kind", but this resulted in his death. The play ends with Arnold telling the cops to take him away, his is ready to go.

It sounds intimidating, but the payoff is worth it. "Glance up at him just as you're about to take his penis as far into your mouth as you can, then maintain eye contact for a few strokes or the entire time," says Kait Scalisi, sex educator and founder of PassionbyKait.com. “This move is super intimate, as extended eye contact causes a release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone, in both of you.”
At this stage, he’ll have understood what is going to happen to him. He’ll be very pleased and this is a good start. Take off his pants, everything will be easy to access. Softly grab his penis in your hands and use your tongue to slowly lick it from the base to the top. Look at him in the eyes, make him beg for you to really take him in your mouth.
Fellatio can be sexually arousing for both participants, and may lead to orgasm for the receiving partner.[3][4] It may be performed by a sexual partner as foreplay before other sexual activities (such as vaginal or anal intercourse),[3][8] or as an erotic and physically intimate act in its own right.[3][4] Like most forms of sexual activity, oral sex creates a risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections (STIs/STDs). However, the transmission risk for oral sex, especially HIV transmission, is significantly lower than for vaginal or anal sex.[9][10][11]
The Magic Missionary is a twist on the regular missionary position that simultaneously stimulates both your and his hot buttons (he gets extremely firm and strong glans stimulation; you get close clitoral stimulation). "Both the man and woman's groin areas stay in constant contact in this position, which can be amazing for orgasms," says Paget. "The heat and sensation are never ending." Most important, the position is fabulous for inducing the sort of muscular contractions that can move mountains. Mattress-wise, it's not an energetic action, explains Paget, but it puts your bod in more pleasure-enhancing motions than the spread-eagle style because it lets you move and squeeze more to build arousal. Plus, your man will be using some of his strongest muscles — his thighs and glutes — so he'll endure like the Energizer Bunny. 

Straddle your man (lying on his back) and slowly lower yourself onto his pelvis, sliding his penis inside you as you go. But rather than sitting down in a straddle position, raise yourself up off him in a squatting position. Put your hands on his thighs, stomach, rib cage or upper chest for support. Start by sliding yourself up and down his member by lifting your lower body up and down — a totally different motion than going forward and back like regular woman-on-top. Vary your pace, starting with some fast, teasingly shallow thrusts that touch only the tip of his penis, then move down into deep, slower thrusts that envelop him completely. The fabulous friction you'll create will give you the double bonus of amazing sensations all along the edge of your vaginal opening when you pump shallow and on your G-spot when you pump deep. And if you try leaning backward and resting your hands on his thighs and knees, the sensation will even spread to your clitoris — and the natural arching of your back will open up your body for him to fondle.
Your hands are sensitive, dexterous, and capable of giving your man intense pleasure and powerful climaxes. With a little skill and confidence, you can fully satisfy your man and leave him feeling saturated with pleasure. Let's face it, sometimes the idea of intercourse or oral sex is too much. But you may be turned on enough to kiss, cuddle, and give your man a fabulous orgasm with your hands!
Arousal The man perceives something or someone that prompts sexual interest. That perception prompts the brain to send a signal down the spinal cord to the sex organs, causing an erection. The penis becomes erect when blood fills spongy tissue inside its shaft, brought by arteries that have expanded to allow blood to race in at up to 50 times its normal speed. The veins in the penis that normally drain blood out squeeze shut so that more blood remains inside, producing a firm erection. The scrotum pulls toward the body, and muscles throughout the body increase in tension.
Scene one opens with Terrill practicing one of his songs while touching up his makeup. Boys dressed as girls return to their dressing rooms, Bunny and Peaches are gossiping, and Chuck and Joe are teasing each other. Stanley comes in and Chuck tells him of his suspicions of Joe, but Stanley notices nothing. Dolores and Randall enter the dressing rooms still arguing about Terrill, while Terrill eaves drops. Arnold calls for Randall and as Randall leaves, Terrill slips a love note into the dressing room for Dolores. Dolores finishes reading the note for a third time when Terrill taps on Dolores's door. They show each other affection through the door until Otto and Stanley interrupt Terrill infuriated with him. The girls then start gossiping about guys and they begin to talk about the struggles between Dolores and Randall. Stanley and Terrill have a conversation about how Terrill gets all these girls to like him. Dolores then writes a note but hides it as Randall enters. Randall speaks of not wanting to lose Dolores. Lester arrives inviting everyone to Toto's big after-party as Arnold leaves to get gelatins. Arnold comes back and runs into Stanley and Terrill talking about girls Terrill has wooed. Arnold notices a picture of a girl that Terrill has been with and asks about her, but Terrill hardly remembers her. Arnold speaks to Steve about technical things and a call boy arrives saying there is a girl who wants to see Terrill. Mary Ann then comes in and tells Terrill that he must marry her. Terrill shoves her and she hits the stairway, screams, and faints. Paradise runs in and tries to help Mary Ann. Arnold then runs in and states who she is and helps as well. The rest of the girls crowd around and the scene closes with Paradise warning Dolores that she could be next. Scene two opens with Stanley interrogating Paradise. She tells him what she saw and Stanley then moves on to interrogate the hoofers. Terrill arrives from the stage and Paradise confronts him. Terrill threatens her but she doesn't back down so he leaves for his dressing room. Stanley tells Terrill he found a letter addressed to him, but doesn't know who it's from. Terrill lies saying it's probably from Flo. He then reads the letter. Meanwhile, the girls are calming Paradise down as she is extremely angry. She has a suspicion that Terrill was involved in Mary Ann's rough past, but she isn't going to ask questions because she fears her safety will be in danger. Terrill then meets with Dolores and they embrace. Randall comes and catches them together. He threatens Terrill's life and the curtain falls.
There’s lots of ways to make always-great sex even greater, and there are some specific sex positions that, when explored, can lead to extra excitement. There are various ways to look at what a specifically male pleasure position may mean to you — for starters, though, it should be one that gives greater than average physical pleasure or one that’s especially exciting. From there, the possibilities are endless, but here are some great ways to get started! 

Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  
This is a letter of success.. though not what I set out to succeed but success none the less. Christian never did get a second bj out of me because I dumped his sorry ass after him putting me down one time too often. I met a new guy in Arizona... and last night we had our third date - here at my house for swimming, dinner cooked by me and hang out.
When was the last time you had sex with just your hands? What are your first thoughts when this question is posed? Many women haven't brought a man fully to climax with just their hands since high school or college. Some think it "doesn't count as sex." Others are simply at a loss, claiming they don't know how. Or, you might think a man can do that all on his own, so why would you bother?
Foreplay can mean the difference between a standard oral sex experience and the best. time. ever. To up the excitement, start by licking, blowing, stroking, and kissing everything but his penis. “Wait until he’s flushed, panting, and practically — or really! — begging for it. It’ll be more than worth the wait,” says Scalisi. You could also turn foreplay into a game with some Naughty Roll Play Dice ($18, babeland.com). They'll tell you exactly where to touch each other.

Tanya's Deep-throat Manifesto, my co-author and friend Tanya J., a former adult film star, teaches you the ins and outs of deep-throating like a pro – killing your gag-reflex has never been this easy. Believe it or not – mastering the art of deep-throating is your one way ticket to a loving relationship. Once you go "all in" he'll never view you the same again.
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