Learn to Suck Him Better
How to find it: The sacrum is the triangular bone located at the base of his spine in between his hips (think: the small of his back). There are nerves in the sacrum that are linked to the genitals, so stimulating these nerves can send sensations to his manly parts. In fact, some studies show that electrical stimulation of these nerves can trigger orgasm.
^ Ken Plummer (2002). Modern Homosexualities: Fragments of Lesbian and Gay Experiences. Routledge. pp. 187–191. ISBN 1134922426. Retrieved August 24, 2013. The social construction of 'sex' as vaginal intercourse affects how other forms of sexual activity are evaluated as sexually satisfying or arousing; in some cases whether an activity is seen as a sexual act at all. For example, unless a woman has been penetrated by a man's penis she is still technically a virgin even if she has had lots of sexual experience.
Start by lying on your back on a bed with your legs spread apart slightly and your honey kneeling in front of you. He should then place the backs of your knees in the crooks of his elbows and pull upward so that your lower back and butt are raised off the bed at a 20- to 30-degree angle and the backs of your thighs are pressed against his stomach and chest. Try using one or more pillows beneath your tush and back (the more pillows, the less you have to do) to hike yourself up a bit so he has a prime pleasure-you angle. He should be able to enter you easily this way, as your buttocks will be cupped between his quads with your genitals pressing right up against his. Although you'll have to expend a bit of effort to keep your thighs together, it will be well worth it! "This position allows the man to maintain his balance and push his hips forward when he pulls your body toward and away from him, attaining a very easily maintained rhythmic motion," says Paget. And the better the rhythm, the better your chances of a mind-blowing orgasm.
You can kiss his penis any way you want, but it will be a lot easier when you use your hand to hold it in place while you kiss it. There are multiple different ways to kiss his penis, from giving him small, quick ‘pecks’, to giving him longer, more intense kisses. He’ll especially love it if you give him extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don’t be surprised if you can see precum or semen dripping from his cock at this stage.
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Resolution and refraction After ejaculation, the penis begins to lose its erection. About half of the erection is lost immediately, and the rest fades soon after. Muscle tension fades, and the man may feel relaxed or drowsy, according to Ingber. Men usually must undergo a refractory period, or recovery phase, during which they cannot achieve another erection. This period is variable in men, says Ingber. In an 18-year-old, this is typically less than 15 minutes. In elderly men, it can be up to 10 to 20 hours. The average refractory period is about half an hour. Men differ from women in that men usually are satiated after one orgasm. Women can experience more than one orgasm with no loss of sexual arousal, and do not have to undergo a refractory period.
In some cultures, such as Cambodia, Chinese in Southeast Asia, northern Manchu tribes along Amur River, Sambians in Papua New Guinea, Thailand, Telugus of India, Hawaii and other Pacific Islanders, briefly taking the penis of a male infant or toddler into one's mouth was considered a nonsexual form of affection or even a form of ritual, greeting, respect, parenting love, or lifesaving. According to some sources, it was an ancient Chinese custom for grandmothers, mothers, and elder sisters to calm their baby boys with fellatio. It has also been reported that some modern Chinese mothers have performed fellatio to their moribund sons as affection and means for lifesaving, because they culturally believe that when the penis is completely retracted into the abdomen, the boy or man will die.
Cultural views on oral sex range from aversion to high regard. It, especially fellatio, has been considered taboo, or at least discouraged, in many cultures and parts of the world. Laws of some jurisdictions regard oral sex as penetrative sex for the purposes of sexual offenses with regard to the act, but most countries do not have laws which ban the practice itself, in contrast to anal sex or extramarital sex.
The key to making oral sex safe is to avoid mouth-to-genital contact and the transmission of any bodily fluids. Condoms, including flavored varieties, can be used to perform oral sex on men. For going down on women, thin sheets of latex called dental dams can be purchased online or in sex-toy stores. There's also the female condom, but like dental dams, these aren't as easy to come by as the male version.
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how men can be better sexual partners to women.
15. Sometimes a penis doesn't smell good and that's because some men are disgusting. I don't think anyone expects a hard penis to smell like Chanel perfume or strawberry Lipsmackers or whatever (although OMG, they should) but some guys are less clean than others. Also. People sweat more in the summertime. Consider this. The crotch area is not free of sweat glands. Personally, I don't think it's rude to kindly suggest a sexy shower together beforehand.
Don’t be fooled by the term “oral sex” — your mouth doesn’t have to carry the full burden of her pleasure. “Your tongue is great, don’t get me wrong, but you’ve got two other tools at your disposal that can really help to bring her home: Your hands. You can easily bring your fingers into play while you give your mouth a break," says Morse. "And it doesn’t stop there: A lot of women really enjoy a bit of manual stimulation during cunnilingus,” says Morse. Doing so can even help her orgasm faster.
Getting HIV from oral sex may be less likely than vaginal or anal sex, but it still carries risk. If you are having oral sex you should still protect yourself. Repeated unprotected oral sex exposure to HIV may represent a considerable risk for spread of HIV, as well as other STDs for which the risk of spread through oral sex has not been as well studied.
Along the same lines of not being bashful, Dr. Jill McDevitt, CalExotics’ Resident Sexologist, says it’s really important to spread the labia during cunnilingus. This way, your partner has the space to approach the clitoris from all angles and sides. “Typically, beginners are really bashful about this, but spread the labia wide, get in the folds, and sensation will improve.” This is also good to keep in mind when you’re receiving cunnilingus. Don’t be afraid to reach down and ~show yourself~ for your partner.
The Nipples: Bursting full of nerve endings, the nipples are always a great way to turn him on without actually giving him anything. After a good kiss, and before you go down on him, pause at the nipples and lick, suck and bite on them (very, very softly, please, I don’t want to end up in a court case named ‘Bitten-Off Nipple vs Buonasorte’). Also, don’t forget that there are two nipples and not just one.
Bad news first: Blow jobs are always a little bit intimidating. Thrusting your face at a penis is hard sometimes — pun intended, obviously. But it's especially nerve-wracking the very first time you do it. Just like you were probably a little nervous the first time you tried some wild new food, it can be scary to put something brand new in your mouth.
After massaging him for a few minutes, help him take off his trousers and briefs. Then just keep doing what you were doing, running your hands over his manhood. If you like, you can also softly trace your fingers up and down his dick and around his balls. If you want to learn more hand job techniques, then make sure to check out the Hand Job Guide here.
I have no idea really how to be sexy. I have no imagination when it comes to sex. My husband is a freak and wants to do new things. Things I don’t really care to do but I do them because he likes it. Tried the three some thing. Hated it refuse to do it again. Just the thought of him with another woman irritates me. I’m simple. My wants and desires are simple. I just want to be wanted. Is there something wrong with me if I have no desire to not explore new things ? How do I get out of that feeling? He expects me to come up with new things and I truly don’t know what else to do. Right now we are exploring dildos and strap ons. This also made me read about blow jobs. I’m not very good at it and he’s made that clear. I gag if it goes too deep I gag if there’s just a hint of cum. He asks me if I like certain things I say yes because I know it turns him on when I really don’t like it. Any advice for the non sexual person?
Mare Simone, a certified Tantra educator, says that using your hot breath to stimulate nerve endings is an amazing way to ramp up foreplay before diving in. This works just as well with fellatio as it does with cunnilingus, too. Next time you’re going down on your partner, just take a step back to breathe on their sensitive parts before making contact. The suspense will turn them on in ways you didn’t know were possible.
Oral sex is common among sexually active adults. According to a national survey conducted from June 2006 through December 2008, over 80% of sexually active youth and adults ages 15-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. The same survey found that 45% or more of teenage girls and boys (ages 15-19 years) report having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
5. And speaking of that: It probably feels nothing at all like you think it does. Unless you also have a penis and have received a blow job before, the best you can do is merely speculate what getting one feels like. All you need to know is that men tend to describe them favorably, or as one guy eloquently puts it: "If sex is putting your penis in a wet, unplugged vacuum ... a blow job is plugging that vacuum in." So put all those worries that it doesn't feel good out of your mind. Assuredly, he's into it.
The Ancient Indian Kama Sutra, dating from the first century AD, describes oral sex, discussing fellatio in great detail (the Kama Sutra has a chapter on auparishtaka (or oparishtaka), "mouth congress") and only briefly mentioning cunnilingus. However, according to the Kama Sutra, fellatio is above all a characteristic of eunuchs (or, according to other translations, of effeminate homosexuals or transwomen similar to the modern Hijra of India), who use their mouths as a substitute for female genitalia.
Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.
Scene one opens with Terrill practicing one of his songs while touching up his makeup. Boys dressed as girls return to their dressing rooms, Bunny and Peaches are gossiping, and Chuck and Joe are teasing each other. Stanley comes in and Chuck tells him of his suspicions of Joe, but Stanley notices nothing. Dolores and Randall enter the dressing rooms still arguing about Terrill, while Terrill eaves drops. Arnold calls for Randall and as Randall leaves, Terrill slips a love note into the dressing room for Dolores. Dolores finishes reading the note for a third time when Terrill taps on Dolores's door. They show each other affection through the door until Otto and Stanley interrupt Terrill infuriated with him. The girls then start gossiping about guys and they begin to talk about the struggles between Dolores and Randall. Stanley and Terrill have a conversation about how Terrill gets all these girls to like him. Dolores then writes a note but hides it as Randall enters. Randall speaks of not wanting to lose Dolores. Lester arrives inviting everyone to Toto's big after-party as Arnold leaves to get gelatins. Arnold comes back and runs into Stanley and Terrill talking about girls Terrill has wooed. Arnold notices a picture of a girl that Terrill has been with and asks about her, but Terrill hardly remembers her. Arnold speaks to Steve about technical things and a call boy arrives saying there is a girl who wants to see Terrill. Mary Ann then comes in and tells Terrill that he must marry her. Terrill shoves her and she hits the stairway, screams, and faints. Paradise runs in and tries to help Mary Ann. Arnold then runs in and states who she is and helps as well. The rest of the girls crowd around and the scene closes with Paradise warning Dolores that she could be next. Scene two opens with Stanley interrogating Paradise. She tells him what she saw and Stanley then moves on to interrogate the hoofers. Terrill arrives from the stage and Paradise confronts him. Terrill threatens her but she doesn't back down so he leaves for his dressing room. Stanley tells Terrill he found a letter addressed to him, but doesn't know who it's from. Terrill lies saying it's probably from Flo. He then reads the letter. Meanwhile, the girls are calming Paradise down as she is extremely angry. She has a suspicion that Terrill was involved in Mary Ann's rough past, but she isn't going to ask questions because she fears her safety will be in danger. Terrill then meets with Dolores and they embrace. Randall comes and catches them together. He threatens Terrill's life and the curtain falls.
^ Jump up to: a b Bryan Strong, Christine DeVault, Theodore F. Cohen (2010). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationship in a Changing Society. Cengage Learning. p. 186. ISBN 0-534-62425-1. Retrieved October 8, 2011. Most people agree that we maintain virginity as long as we refrain from sexual (vaginal) intercourse. But occasionally we hear people speak of 'technical virginity' [...] Data indicate that 'a very significant proportion of teens ha[ve] had experience with oral sex, even if they haven't had sexual intercourse, and may think of themselves as virgins' [...] Other research, especially research looking into virginity loss, reports that 35% of virgins, defined as people who have never engaged in vaginal intercourse, have nonetheless engaged in one or more other forms of heterosexual sexual activity (e.g., oral sex, anal sex, or mutual masturbation).
^ Robert Crooks; Karla Baur (2010). Our Sexuality. Cengage Learning. pp. 286–289. ISBN 0495812943. Retrieved August 30, 2012. Noncoital forms of sexual intimacy, which have been called outercourse, can be a viable form of birth control. Outercourse includes all avenues of sexual intimacy other than penile–vaginal intercourse, including kissing, touching, mutual masturbation, and oral and anal sex.
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^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and 47-49 for male virginity, how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and for how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
To Control – Using sex as a weapon and method for controlling your man is a recipe for disaster. If you start withholding sex to try to get your husband to do something, then both of you are going to develop a negative attitude towards all things sex very quickly. Equally, promising to give him a blow job only if he does this or that is going to foster an unhealthy situation for your sex life.
On the other hand, you don’t want to get so invested in making her feel good that you wind up pressuring her to orgasm. It’s great to want to make her orgasm, but don’t make her feel like she needs to orgasm. Many women are sensitive to feeling pressured in the bedroom, but orgasm is impossible when it feels like an expectation. Her pleasure should be important to you simply because you want her to feel good, not because you want to boost your ego.
8. Anyone who DEMANDS a blow job is almost certainly not worth a moment of your time. Yeah, this should go without saying, but I'm gonna say it anyway. No one should ever demand or force any sexual act from you, and this goes for blow jobs, too. Some men have this (wrong, completely bogus) idea in their head that they deserve oral sex. LOL, no. If anyone ever says they require a blow job, feel free to say you require hooking up with people who aren't dickheads.