We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off-limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how men can be better sexual partners to women.
Drive him wild: Ease into it slowly. "Use your hand to stroke him, run your fingernails over the area, then build up to a gentle slap," Cavanah says. Or, when he is lying on his stomach, try kissing a trail down his back, over his buttocks, and then gently nibbling along this fold and flicking it with your tongue before moving on to his inner thighs.
^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and 47-49 for male virginity, how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and for how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
When Lillian Schissel edited "Three Plays by Mae West,' published in 1997, it marked the first time Sex, The Drag and The Pleasure Man had ever been printed. Long thought to be lost, the original manuscripts gathered dust at the Library of Congress. After prolonged legal wrangling with the Roger Richman Agency of Los Angeles, who at the time represented the Mae West receivership estate, a deal was finally struck to have the plays finally published. 

Sexually active individuals should get tested regularly for STIs and HIV, and talk to all partner(s) about STIs. Anyone who thinks that he/she might have an STI should stop having sex and visit a doctor or clinic to get tested. There are free and low-cost options for testing available. It is important to talk openly with a health care provider about any activities that might put a person at risk for an STI, including oral sex.
9. It isn't a fancy massage at a spa and therefore doesn't have to be all about him. You ever heard of something called "sensate focus?" It's a sex therapy technique in which you focus on touch and the physical pleasure it brings you, and you can totally use it to ease blow job-anxiety or just ~mix it up~ a little. Basically. instead of doing what you think you're supposed to do to make him feel great, employ blow job techniques that feel fun 'n exciting to you. Oral sex doesn't have to be as one-sided as its reputation says it should be.

If you have a comfortable recliner or reading chair, try putting a pillow on the floor in front of you, scooting to the edge of the chair and inviting your partner to kneel in front of you. This can also work on the edge of a bed. Inviting your lover to kneel in front of you and perform oral sex is a delicious way to allow them to worship your lovely body.
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^ Jump up to: a b Tan, Min; Gareth Jones; Guangjian Zhu; Jianping Ye; Tiyu Hong; Shanyi Zhou; Shuyi Zhang; Libiao Zhang (October 28, 2009). Hosken, David, ed. "Fellatio by Fruit Bats Prolongs Copulation Time". PLoS ONE. 4 (10): e7595. Bibcode:2009PLoSO...4.7595T. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0007595. PMC 2762080. PMID 19862320. Retrieved October 28, 2009.


When Lillian Schissel edited "Three Plays by Mae West,' published in 1997, it marked the first time Sex, The Drag and The Pleasure Man had ever been printed. Long thought to be lost, the original manuscripts gathered dust at the Library of Congress. After prolonged legal wrangling with the Roger Richman Agency of Los Angeles, who at the time represented the Mae West receivership estate, a deal was finally struck to have the plays finally published.
We all know the classic 69 position, but very few people can actually reach orgasm in this position. One of the greatest things about oral sex is taking turns. One person gets to totally relax and receive, and the other person can focus on giving as much pleasure as possible. 69 can be really distracting, and most people just end up moaning and gasping rather than focusing on giving.

If you’ve ever given a man oral sex and wondered about the potential health risks of swollowing his semen (assuming he’s free of sexually transmitted infections and the Zika virus, that is), rest easy; there's no evidence it can cause any harm. Some studies have even suggested that exposure to semen offers strange health benefits—like a reduced likelihood of preeclampsia or depression.


5. And speaking of that: It probably feels nothing at all like you think it does. Unless you also have a penis and have received a blow job before, the best you can do is merely speculate what getting one feels like. All you need to know is that men tend to describe them favorably, or as one guy eloquently puts it: "If sex is putting your penis in a wet, unplugged vacuum ... a blow job is plugging that vacuum in." So put all those worries that it doesn't feel good out of your mind. Assuredly, he's into it.

Plant your feet on the mattress, allowing you to push off your feet and move your hips. This can be your first step in becoming a more active receiver during oral sex. By shifting your hips a little up and down, or to the right and left, you can help your lover's tongue find your most sensitive spots. Once you gain more confidence and are ready to go wild, try moving your hips in circles to maximize your pleasure.
While there's no male equivalent for the queening position, men deserve to feel like royalty, too. Receiving oral sex while seated in a comfortable chair, his lover kneeling in front of him, is perhaps the closest men can feel to sitting on a throne. Make it even more special by allowing him to watch a sports game, porn or another video of choice. Or put a special drink in his hand, or light a cigar before going down.
Some babes crave one thing and one thing only... and that is to get on their knees and suck cock. At Youporn.com, you will find yourself almost overwhelmed by the selection of sexy blowjob porn videos dedicated to BJ scenes. There are a number of beautiful sirens all too happy to be filmed while giving the best hummers imaginable. From tight bodied co-eds to long-haired Latinas with big sexy mouths, your fantasies will take over you as you witness these bad girls addicted to cum. From the moment they get their first taste of warm jazz flowing down their throats, they are hooked to the taste and become obsessed with pleasuring as many cocks as possible. They soon become expert cocksuckers, all too happy when their boyfriend comes home from work or when they have to use their dirty mouths to get exactly what they want. These blowjob goddesses are some of the horniest women you will ever feast your eyes on as they are overwhelmed with multiple dicks slapping against their faces. They aren’t satisfied until they get face-fucked and have a chance to deep-throat blowjob a hard dick in a full-length sex clip.
Nancy Friday's book, Men in Love – Men's Sexual Fantasies: The Triumph of Love over Rage, suggests that swallowing semen is high on a man's intimacy scale.[17] The man receiving fellatio receives direct sexual stimulation, while his partner may derive satisfaction from giving him pleasure. Giving and receiving fellatio may happen simultaneously in sex positions like 69 and daisy chain.
Bad news first: Blow jobs are always a little bit intimidating. Thrusting your face at a penis is hard sometimes — pun intended, obviously. But it's especially nerve-wracking the very first time you do it. Just like you were probably a little nervous the first time you tried some wild new food, it can be scary to put something brand new in your mouth.
Each new partner does not come with an instruction manual, and you can’t always count on your partner to tell you exactly what she wants in the moment. If you’re looking for a hint or two to help you figure out what is working and what isn’t, you’ll have to rely on the next best thing: Her nonverbal cues. “Even if your partner is not a big moaner, her body will tell you everything you need to know," says Morse. Some signs to look for include quicker breathing, her body becoming flushed, a more engorged clitoris, more vaginal lubrication, and her thrusting her pelvis closer to you. "If all else fails, you can always ask her if she likes something or not — just be sure to phrase it in a sexy way so it sounds more like dirty talk than a request for feedback,” says Morse.
Most countries do not have laws that ban the practice of oral sex, though some cultures may consider it taboo.[3] People may also have negative feelings or sexual inhibitions about giving or receiving oral sex; they may refuse to engage in it of their own volition.[3] Commonly, people do not regard forms of oral sex as affecting the virginity of either partner, though opinions on the matter vary.[12][13][14][15] 

Once you’ve located the clitoris, you don’t want to immediately rush in. “Tease her with your mouth and hands to build anticipation and arousal. Kiss her softly around the clitoris, gently nibble on her inner thighs and take your time slowly pulling off her underwear,” says Morse. You can also heighten arousal by touching and kissing her through the fabric. Once you're dealing with bare skin, you can start with slow tongue motions. Moving slowly, lick up and down, with gentle strokes and a flat tongue. 
Oral sex is common among sexually active adults. According to a national survey conducted from June 2006 through December 2008, over 80% of sexually active youth and adults ages 15-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. The same survey found that 45% or more of teenage girls and boys (ages 15-19 years) report having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
Plant your feet on the mattress, allowing you to push off your feet and move your hips. This can be your first step in becoming a more active receiver during oral sex. By shifting your hips a little up and down, or to the right and left, you can help your lover's tongue find your most sensitive spots. Once you gain more confidence and are ready to go wild, try moving your hips in circles to maximize your pleasure.
This decision is entirely up to you. There's nothing wrong with you if you don't want to, but it's nice to let your partner know it's nothing personal. If you don't want to swallow, and you aren’t familiar with the signs of imminent ejaculation, let him know you want a warning. Remove your mouth as he's about to ejaculate, and continue hand stroking through his orgasm.
Make him go wild: Your best bet is to talk to your guy outside of the bedroom before you try to finger his anus so he doesn't get any unwanted surprises. Try bringing it up during a romantic dinner by saying you love making love with him, and want to experiment even more. You might say that you heard stimulating his prostate can trigger a really intense orgasm, and see if he would be down to try it later on. If your guy isn't comfortable with you using your fingers to gently penetrate the area, there are other ways to stimulate his prostate. One way to do this is to give some loving to his perineum, or the smooth strip of skin between his testicles and anus. The prostate is internally located between the base of his penis and his anus so touching him on the outside of that area can externally stimulate the gland. "Have him lie on his back with his knees bend and legs spread apart, and then use your fist to apply even pressure to the area with quick vibration-like motions," Michaels says.   

Option 2 is that you keep reading Cosmo and similar women's magazines, or listen to your "more experienced" girlfriends that are "sexperts" when it comes to men and blowjobs. How far did listening to them get you? Sure, you can learn a thing or two, but you have access to the exact same basic information all other women do as well. It doesn't make you special. And most guys laugh out loud when they see what kind of BS advice women get. Of course guys get turned off.
Plant your feet on the mattress, allowing you to push off your feet and move your hips. This can be your first step in becoming a more active receiver during oral sex. By shifting your hips a little up and down, or to the right and left, you can help your lover's tongue find your most sensitive spots. Once you gain more confidence and are ready to go wild, try moving your hips in circles to maximize your pleasure.

Positions that tend to allow men full control of penetration (this can mean depth, rhythm, etc.) tend to give men more pleasure. “This typically means that rear-entry positions allow for the most access as he is in control and her body allows deeper penetration in these positions, whether it's doggy style or some other variation,” says Dr. Kat Van Kirk, a licensed marriage and sex therapist and resident sex expert for www.AdamandEve.com.  

Regardless of if you’re performing fellatio or cunnilingus, it’s supes important to show enthusiasm. Think about it. The best technical skill in the world doesn’t matter if the giver seems bored, uninterested, or even worse, turned off while going down on you. Kovacs recommends vocal enthusiasm, eye contact, and smiling to show your partner how much you enjoy pleasing them. It’s also important to be okay with messiness. “Show your partner that you like having their deliciousness all over your face. That nothing about them doesn't turn you on, and that you delight in their delight.” says Kovacs.

Hey Jack, i had so much fun reading the book ! bad timing getting it during exam week ! i barely studied ! lol , and even read it at the job ! ( call center, not so bad ahahah ) well, totally worth it ! He even told me '' i dont think its healthy for me to cum that hard '' you made me proud of my blow jobs ! I never had problem with the passion part, in fact , before i felt like i enoyed giving him head more then he liked receiving it !! So a lot of the techniques were good for me. thanks again !


The author of the Kama Sutra states that it is also practiced by "unchaste women", but mentions that there are widespread traditional concerns about this being a degrading or unclean practice, with known practitioners being evaded as love partners in large parts of the country. The author appears to somewhat agree with these attitudes, claiming that "a wise man" should not engage in that form of intercourse while acknowledging that it can be appropriate in some unspecified cases.
The essential aspect of fellatio is for a man's sex partner to take his penis into their mouth, and then move their mouth up and down the penis to a rhythm set by them mimicking the thrusting motion of vaginal or anal intercourse, with saliva acting as a lubricant, and being careful not to bite or scratch with the teeth.[3] The man receiving fellatio can slow the rhythm of the stimulation by holding his partner's head. The man's partner may also orally play with his penis by licking, sucking, kissing or otherwise playing with the tongue and lips.[3] Fellatio may also include the oral stimulation of the scrotum, whether licking, sucking or taking the entire scrotum into the mouth.[5][6]
Fellatio is legal in most countries. Laws of some jurisdictions regard fellatio as penetrative sex for the purposes of sexual offenses with regard to the act, but most countries do not have laws which ban the practice, in contrast to anal sex or extramarital sex. In Islamic literature, the only forms of sexual activity that are consistently explicitly prohibited within marriage are anal sex and sexual activity during menstrual cycles.[39] However, the exact attitude towards oral sex is a subject of disagreements between modern scholars of Islam. Authorities considering it "objectionable" do so because of the penis's supposedly impure fluids coming in contact with the mouth.[40] Others emphasize that there is no decisive evidence to forbid oral sex.[41]
Some babes crave one thing and one thing only... and that is to get on their knees and suck cock. At Youporn.com, you will find yourself almost overwhelmed by the selection of sexy blowjob porn videos dedicated to BJ scenes. There are a number of beautiful sirens all too happy to be filmed while giving the best hummers imaginable. From tight bodied co-eds to long-haired Latinas with big sexy mouths, your fantasies will take over you as you witness these bad girls addicted to cum. From the moment they get their first taste of warm jazz flowing down their throats, they are hooked to the taste and become obsessed with pleasuring as many cocks as possible. They soon become expert cocksuckers, all too happy when their boyfriend comes home from work or when they have to use their dirty mouths to get exactly what they want. These blowjob goddesses are some of the horniest women you will ever feast your eyes on as they are overwhelmed with multiple dicks slapping against their faces. They aren’t satisfied until they get face-fucked and have a chance to deep-throat blowjob a hard dick in a full-length sex clip.
Mare Simone, a certified Tantra educator, says that using your hot breath to stimulate nerve endings is an amazing way to ramp up foreplay before diving in. This works just as well with fellatio as it does with cunnilingus, too. Next time you’re going down on your partner, just take a step back to breathe on their sensitive parts before making contact. The suspense will turn them on in ways you didn’t know were possible.
Receiving oral sex while standing up opens up a few great pleasure benefits. Most importantly, the giver uses their hands to add more stimulation to oral sex. Using hand job techniques during oral sex allows complete stimulation of the entire penis while taking the pressure off the giver to take the entire length of their lover's shaft into their mouth.
Well since reading your book. Our love has connected us, on many levels, I would of never believed it without seeing it with my own eyes, my husband is "in love" with me. He loves the new me, I send him little text messages, and he get's arroused, and so do I just thinking about, being with him. We actually feel as though we are having a affair with each other, because the things we are doing and saying, would under normal circumstances, would never happen. I feel young again, and like I am in love for the first time.

"The key is to breathe in through your mouth and out through your nose. If you can learn circular breathing (something musicians who play instruments that require breath know), you can go down on a girl for hours without having to come up for air. It's actually reverse circular breathing. To make sure your tongue doesn't cramp up, keep your jaw comfortably open and loose. I've found that upward strokes under the clitoral hood where the clitoris is are one of the best motions."

The thing is, I'm not your boyfriend and I don't have a reason to lie to you that your blowjobs are great when, in fact, you probably have no idea what you're doing. Even if you're "good" – that just doesn't cut it. You have no idea how mind-blowing your blowjobs can actually be. If don't ruin blowjobs for any other woman that ever puts her lips around him, then you're not doing a good job and you're not protecting your relationship.
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