Drive him wild: Many guys are heavily conditioned to focus solely on the genitals. "If you expand his capacity to have erotic experiences throughout his entire body, you can open up a whole other world of possibility for him," Michaels says. The thumb is actually a sexy spot for a lot of guys. "To suck on a man's thumb evokes sucking on something else, and can help him connect his mind and body during lovemaking. Start off foreplay by gazing into his eyes as you kiss his hands, and then suck on his thumb as a promise for what's to come," Michaels suggests.
Bad news first: Blow jobs are always a little bit intimidating. Thrusting your face at a penis is hard sometimes — pun intended, obviously. But it's especially nerve-wracking the very first time you do it. Just like you were probably a little nervous the first time you tried some wild new food, it can be scary to put something brand new in your mouth.
^ Jump up to: a b Tan, Min; Gareth Jones; Guangjian Zhu; Jianping Ye; Tiyu Hong; Shanyi Zhou; Shuyi Zhang; Libiao Zhang (October 28, 2009). Hosken, David, ed. "Fellatio by Fruit Bats Prolongs Copulation Time". PLoS ONE. 4 (10): e7595. Bibcode:2009PLoSO...4.7595T. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0007595. PMC 2762080. PMID 19862320. Retrieved October 28, 2009.
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As with other types of sexual activity, oral sex carries the risk of STIs. It may be possible to get some STIs in the mouth or throat from giving oral sex to a partner with a genital or anal/rectal infection, particularly from giving fellatio. It also may be possible to get certain STIs on the penis, and possibly the vagina, anus or rectum, from receiving oral sex from a partner with a mouth or throat infection. It’s possible to have an STI in more than one area, for example in the throat and the genitals.
Drive him wild: Many guys are heavily conditioned to focus solely on the genitals. "If you expand his capacity to have erotic experiences throughout his entire body, you can open up a whole other world of possibility for him," Michaels says. The thumb is actually a sexy spot for a lot of guys. "To suck on a man's thumb evokes sucking on something else, and can help him connect his mind and body during lovemaking. Start off foreplay by gazing into his eyes as you kiss his hands, and then suck on his thumb as a promise for what's to come," Michaels suggests.
There are a whole bunch of places on his body (besides the shaft of his penis!) that are supersensitive and can lead to a mind-blowing experience. For starters, work the area around his penis — his balls, obviously, the scrotum, and the perineum (that place between his balls and his butt). Feel free to let your hands roam over other sensitive areas around his body, too — like behind his knees, his butt, and his inner thighs.
His Shaft: No, I’m not talking that empty space you can look out to from your bathroom window but rather his genitals. For something extra special, form two rings with your thumb and index fingers placing one at the end and one on the head and move them in opposite directions meeting in the middle. Start slow, go faster and slow down again, and close your eyes… a pinky eye is not becoming on anyone!
As someone who was sexually abused throughout most of my childhood, I’ve been reluctant to give head because of the flashbacks. I’ve been reading your blog for a few days now, and I feel confident in knowing more techniques to try out on my partner that are 100% different from all that bad stuff. In the twelve years since I’ve escaped, I’ve never felt so confident to try this out with my partner, so THANK YOU! I’m sure he will enjoy it too!
For oral sex on a man, use a condom during oral sex. For oral sex on a woman, or when performing anilingus on a man or a woman, use a dam. A dam is a small thin latex or plastic square that acts as a barrier between the vagina or anus and the mouth. It may prevent the spread of STIs. You can buy dams at some sexual health clinics, online or at your pharmacy. 
Option 2 is that you keep reading Cosmo and similar women's magazines, or listen to your "more experienced" girlfriends that are "sexperts" when it comes to men and blowjobs. How far did listening to them get you? Sure, you can learn a thing or two, but you have access to the exact same basic information all other women do as well. It doesn't make you special. And most guys laugh out loud when they see what kind of BS advice women get. Of course guys get turned off.
Using your hands is also the best way to explore prolonging his arousal and delaying ejaculation. Your hands can quickly respond to feedback, allowing you to back off on stimulation before he reaches the point of "no return" and climaxes. After you gain confidence using your hands to pleasure him, begin playing with prolonging his pleasure. Work together to notice and communicate as he gets closer to ejaculation, and play with backing off and building up as many times as you can before he simply can't wait any longer and wants to experience his climax.

While male nipples are basically the same as human nipples, they might even be more sensitive than yours since guys aren’t used to having them touched so often. "For a lot of men, their nipples are uncharted territory — an erogenous zone they haven't experimented with," explains Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles-based clinical sexologist and author of the The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage. Touch them, however, and you'll send shock waves of pleasure radiating through him, she adds.
23. 69ing is terrible and overrated and bad, and let's just ban it already. OK, maybe you like it but IMO, it is terrible and dumb. The whole point of oral sex is that you can just lie there and do nothing while someone else gives you extreme pleasure. 69ing is like if, while getting a professional massage, you had to also file your taxes at the same time. Doesn't that sound like a nightmare to you? Because it is. It would be a nightmare.
A report issued in September 2005 by the National Center for Health Statistics was the basis of an article in the September 26, 2005 issue of Time magazine. The report comes from the results of a computer-administered survey of over 12,000 Americans between the ages of 15 and 44, and states that over half the teenagers questioned have had oral sex. While some headlines have interpreted this as evidence that oral sex among teenagers is "on the rise", this was the first comprehensive study of its kind to examine the matter.[25] The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) stated in 2009: "Studies indicate that oral sex is commonly practiced by sexually active male-female and same-gender couples of various ages, including adolescents."[13] Research also indicates that "males are more likely than females to have received oral sex, whereas equal proportions of men and women have given oral sex."[1]

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Try this: Overstreet suggests kissing your partner across his shoulder, up his neck, and stopping right before you hit his ear. Do this to both sides, because asymmetry is for the lazy. When he’s right about to lose it, start kissing his earlobe, and use your tongue to bring his earlobe into your mouth. Play around with gentle nibbles, tongue, etc. Be careful not to touch any other part of his body while doing this and see how wild he gets from you just touching his earlobes.
Try this: Have your partner take his shirt off and lay on his stomach with his arms by his side. Hot tip: keep his pants on, but pull them down a few inches for a tantalizing never-nude experience ;). Lightly run your fingers and or anxiety-ravaged cuticles down across his lower back, stopping before you hit ass cheek. Do not pass ‘Go’, collect $200, or go past his crack.

There is an increased risk of STI transmission if the receiving partner has wounds on his or her genitals, or if the giving partner has wounds or open sores on or in his or her mouth, or bleeding gums.[5][6][13] Brushing the teeth, flossing, undergoing dental work soon before or after performing oral sex can also increase the risk of transmission, because all of these activities can cause small scratches in the lining of the mouth.[5][6] These wounds, even when they are microscopic, increase the chances of contracting STIs that can be transmitted orally under these conditions.[5][6] Such contact can also lead to more mundane infections from common bacteria and viruses found in, around and secreted from the genital regions. Because of the aforementioned factors, medical sources advise the use of condoms or other effective barrier methods when performing or receiving oral sex with a partner whose STI status is unknown.[4][5][6][26]

But now the good news! Other people have literally already been there, done that, and can help you get over your own pre-BJ woes. Whether you're preparing for your first for thousandth blow job, there are always new lessons to be learned. Especially when it comes to dick-in-mouth. Here are 24 pieces of sage guidance that all grown women wish they'd known before giving their first blow jobs.
There are several ways to reduce the risk of HIV transmission from oral sex. Naturally, some will be more acceptable than others to different individuals, so you must make your own decisions about the level of risk you find acceptable. If you would like to discuss these issues, ask to see a health adviser, or other health professional, at your HIV treatment centre or sexual health clinic. Many of the strategies below will also provide protection against other sexually transmitted infections:
You and your man will quickly realize why The Lusty Leapfrog has such climax potential: Hovering in a sexy squat above your man — rather than sitting or straddling him squarely — gives you the perfect chance to clench him tight. "This is one of the easiest positions in which to flex your PC muscles around the glans of his penis, which can initiate an intense orgasmic response," says Paget. This erotic arrangement also allows for better command of pacing and depth of thrusts (it's easy to vary between deep and shallow), which helps put you in control of your climax, says Kenneth Ray Stubbs, Ph.D., author of The Kama Sutra of Sexual Positions: The Tantric Art of Love. "Squatting will help you feel the entire length of his shaft as you encircle it, and the muscle tension created by holding yourself above him will really add to the intensity of your pleasure."
Dear Beloved Reader, we're going to be real with you. We're asking you to join our membership program so we can become fully financially sustainable (and you get some cool perks too!) With plummeting ad rates across the media industry, we're at an urgent risk of shutting down. And we don't want you to face Trump and his kind without the unique resources we provide. If everyone reading this only gave $12, we could raise enough money for the entire year in just one day. For the price of a single lunch out, you can help save us. We're an independent feminist media site, led entirely by people of color, and that pays everyone who writes for us. If Everyday Feminism has been useful to you, please take one minute to keep us publishing the articles you've come to rely on us for. Thank you! Click here to join!
Regardless of if you’re performing fellatio or cunnilingus, it’s supes important to show enthusiasm. Think about it. The best technical skill in the world doesn’t matter if the giver seems bored, uninterested, or even worse, turned off while going down on you. Kovacs recommends vocal enthusiasm, eye contact, and smiling to show your partner how much you enjoy pleasing them. It’s also important to be okay with messiness. “Show your partner that you like having their deliciousness all over your face. That nothing about them doesn't turn you on, and that you delight in their delight.” says Kovacs.

The sexy views of doggy style and (especially) reverse cowgirl can be great for ass men, who get to view (and touch) the ass as much as they like.  “When physical limitations do not intrude, there’s also a lot to be said for the excitement of lifting his partner up (legs around his waist for stability, and up against a wall for even more stability),” says Queen. 



As with other types of sexual activity, oral sex carries the risk of STIs. It may be possible to get some STIs in the mouth or throat from giving oral sex to a partner with a genital or anal/rectal infection, particularly from giving fellatio. It also may be possible to get certain STIs on the penis, and possibly the vagina, anus or rectum, from receiving oral sex from a partner with a mouth or throat infection. It’s possible to have an STI in more than one area, for example in the throat and the genitals.
5. And speaking of that: It probably feels nothing at all like you think it does. Unless you also have a penis and have received a blow job before, the best you can do is merely speculate what getting one feels like. All you need to know is that men tend to describe them favorably, or as one guy eloquently puts it: "If sex is putting your penis in a wet, unplugged vacuum ... a blow job is plugging that vacuum in." So put all those worries that it doesn't feel good out of your mind. Assuredly, he's into it.

It sounds intimidating, but the payoff is worth it. "Glance up at him just as you're about to take his penis as far into your mouth as you can, then maintain eye contact for a few strokes or the entire time," says Kait Scalisi, sex educator and founder of PassionbyKait.com. “This move is super intimate, as extended eye contact causes a release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone, in both of you.”
The Perineum: Also known as the Valley of Gormi, according to my 19-year-old nephew – don’t ask – the area just underneath the family jewels is a major pleasure point. This is because the prostate gland is located there, so while you’re doing his business down there, rub it in a circular motion. It makes things so much hotter. Madonna, is it August again in here?

Using your hands first, gently caress his inner thighs, penis, scrotum, testicles, and perineum, paying attention to his reactions (verbal and facial) as you touch certain spots. Many men who have sensitivity in their penis are particularly sensitive around the head (known as the glans), especially the frenulum, an indentation between the glans and the shaft on the underside of the penis. You might want to brush up on your knowledge of male sexual anatomy, to know what you’re working with.

^ Jump up to: a b Bryan Strong; Christine DeVault; Theodore F. Cohen (2010). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationship in a Changing Society. Cengage Learning. p. 186. ISBN 0-534-62425-1. Retrieved October 8, 2011. Most people agree that we maintain virginity as long as we refrain from sexual (vaginal) intercourse. But occasionally we hear people speak of 'technical virginity' [...] Data indicate that 'a very significant proportion of teens ha[ve] had experience with oral sex, even if they haven't had sexual intercourse, and may think of themselves as virgins' [...] Other research, especially research looking into virginity loss, reports that 35% of virgins, defined as people who have never engaged in vaginal intercourse, have nonetheless engaged in one or more other forms of heterosexual sexual activity (e.g., oral sex, anal sex, or mutual masturbation).


If you have a comfortable recliner or reading chair, try putting a pillow on the floor in front of you, scooting to the edge of the chair and inviting your partner to kneel in front of you. This can also work on the edge of a bed. Inviting your lover to kneel in front of you and perform oral sex is a delicious way to allow them to worship your lovely body.
You probably already know this, and science backs it up. In one 2016 study, nearly 70% of women described receiving oral as "very pleasurable." This could be because of the direct clitoral stimulation oral offers. A third of women said that they need this kind of touching to reach climax, according to research published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy from 2017.
Combining oral stimulation and hand job techniques will drive him crazy. The easy way is to simply grab his penis and massage it up and down like you would normally do when you give him a hand job. If you feel like adventurous, you can wander about and softly massage their testicles and/or prostate (ask him if he’s ok though) while have him in your mouth.
Option 1 is that you leave and do nothing to improve your sex life. You may think blowjobs are not that important for a relationship's success... and that's OK, but pray a Blowjob Queen never puts her lips around your man's penis. Or your relationship may fall apart like a house of cards in a thunderstorm. I'm a guy and I know how men think – we are sexual, hedonistic creatures and we will always choose better sex if we have the option. Why risk it or worry about it when you can have a carefree, loving relationship?
I’m not really a head giver and but it’s only because I don’t really have any confidence in doing it. Now yesterday I came across your website on facebook and click on it. Once I read the tips that you have posted, I took heed to them. Now be and my bf have been together for 8yrs and when I give him a BJ it’s usually no longer than 5mins. but today I tried some things you’ve posted and he actually admitted to it that it was the best BJ that I have ever done and that it was the first time that I made his eye actually role to the back of his head. When he told me this it made me feel so good and happy inside like I actually knew what I was doing. His actual was were “Damn babe I didn’t know you had it in you like that, it actually felt like I was cumming but I knew I wasn’t.” My thing is what are other things that I can do to keep him like this in this shocking stage? I like to keep him guessing and always want to try new things when giving him a BJ just without him knowing what I’m going to do next. All I really want is to make him cum with just a BJ but he takes longer with those then him being inside of me, what are the key things that I need to do to put him on his a** to the point that he can’t believe what I just did to him. PLEASE HELP ME……BECOME A PRO
Note: Certain things have been suggested to increase a person’s chances of getting HIV during oral sex, if exposed to an infected partner, such as having poor oral health, having bleeding gums or gum disease, having sores in the mouth or on the genitals, or being exposed to the “pre-cum” or “cum” (also known as pre-ejaculate or ejaculate) of an infected partner. However, no scientific studies have been done to show whether or not these factors actually do increase the risk of getting HIV or STI from oral sex.

Try this: Give him a lipstick blowjob — AKA where you brush your closed but relaxed lips against the head of his penis, like you’re applying lipstick. Hold his shaft with your fingers, but not in a fist (avoid holding his penis like a microphone, but do approach it with the same blind confidence of a mediocre stand up act). Keesling suggests varying the sensations by opening your mouth a bit and rubbing his head between them.
The orgasmic advantage of the Canine Coupling (a special version of doggie-style) is that it directs intense, firm pressure from your man's member to your G-spot; pressure so pointed, in fact, that Stubbs says it's "one of the only positions where the penis is touching the G-spot like a bull's-eye. It's a direct hit." Says Paget, "It's primal. This is how animals do it. So when people want to connect with their raw, unbridled, passionate sexuality, they often look to this position." Then there's the erotic incognito element: The fact that neither of you are able to see the other's face can lead to lower self-consciousness and higher pleasure-consciousness. "When you're not able to use your visual sense, you rely on your senses of touch, sound and smell, which allow you to let go and pay attention to the sensations that will help lead you to climax," explains Paget.
Oral sex is commonly used as a means of preserving virginity, especially among heterosexual pairings; this is sometimes termed technical virginity (which additionally includes anal sex, mutual masturbation and other non-penetrative sex acts, but excludes penile-vaginal sex).[7][8][9][11] The concept of "technical virginity" or sexual abstinence through oral sex is popular among teenagers.[12][13] Additionally, gay males may regard oral sex as a way of maintaining their virginities, with penile-anal penetration defined as resulting in virginity loss, while other gay males may define oral sex as their main form of sexual activity.[7][14] By contrast, lesbian pairings commonly view oral sex or fingering as resulting in virginity loss, though definitions of virginity loss vary among lesbians as well.[7][10][15]
Drive him wild: Have your man lie on his stomach and give him a massage by doing light, karate-chop type movements along his sacrum. "Doing this not only stimulates those sacral nerves, but also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which is key for relaxing, letting go, and having an orgasm," Michaels says. (Related: 7 Tips for a Better Orgasm)

All of this pressure women feel around our bodies affects our enjoyment of sex. It’s hard to be in the moment when you’re worried about your stomach looking flabby or ashamed of the way your genitals taste. There’s no way to understand what it’s like to be a woman if you aren’t one, but I bring up this issue because being sensitive about this can help men be better partners to women. Men aren’t responsible for making women feel more self-confident, but you can help her feel more comfortable in the moment. Tell her the specific things you love about her body. Compliment her during the most vulnerable moments, like when you’re taking off her clothes or moving down between her legs. Let her know that the way she tastes and smells turns you on.
Drive him wild: "Gently flicking the raphe with your tongue feels great to most men," Cavanah says. "Let him guide you on how much pressure he likes, because the amount varies depending on the guy." To get him really hot, sip on very warm tea and then flick your heated tongue over this sensitive area. He'll lose himself in the new feelings, and novelty can make for more powerful orgasms.  
20. This is one thing that porn can actually teach you a lot about, like the graphic sex ed you never had in school. Sex ed should definitely be better in this country but I really doubt we'll ever have gym coaches teaching good blow job decorum in front of a bunch of confused teenagers. And that's probably for the best? Anyway. People don't fuck IRL like they do in porn, but sometimes those close-up shots of someone ferociously sucking a D can serve as good little tutorials on how to move your head. Just don't attempt deep-throating if you're not very experienced.
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