Some men can have problems reaching orgasm. These most often stem from psychological factors; for example, they are still affected by a traumatic event or a restrictive upbringing, or they have fallen into masturbation patterns that could have conditioned the body to take longer to orgasm. However, the problem also can be caused by certain medications or by a neurological or cardiovascular disease, or by having surgery where nerves are cut, says Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark New Jersey, and past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
As someone who was sexually abused throughout most of my childhood, I’ve been reluctant to give head because of the flashbacks. I’ve been reading your blog for a few days now, and I feel confident in knowing more techniques to try out on my partner that are 100% different from all that bad stuff. In the twelve years since I’ve escaped, I’ve never felt so confident to try this out with my partner, so THANK YOU! I’m sure he will enjoy it too!
Chlamydia, human papillomavirus (HPV), gonorrhea, herpes, hepatitis (multiple strains), and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs/STDs), can be transmitted through oral sex.[9][10][20] Any sexual exchange of bodily fluids with a person infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, poses a risk of infection. Risk of STI infection, however, is generally considered significantly lower for oral sex than for vaginal or anal sex, with HIV transmission considered the lowest risk with regard to oral sex.[10][11][21][22]
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While male nipples are basically the same as human nipples, they might even be more sensitive than yours since guys aren’t used to having them touched so often. "For a lot of men, their nipples are uncharted territory — an erogenous zone they haven't experimented with," explains Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles-based clinical sexologist and author of the The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sensual Massage. Touch them, however, and you'll send shock waves of pleasure radiating through him, she adds.


The key to making oral sex safe is to avoid mouth-to-genital contact and the transmission of any bodily fluids. Condoms, including flavored varieties, can be used to perform oral sex on men. For going down on women, thin sheets of latex called dental dams can be purchased online or in sex-toy stores. There's also the female condom, but like dental dams, these aren't as easy to come by as the male version.
Zoey's boyfriend got tired of constantly being on the receiving end of bad blowjobs so he took her to his mature Ex lover for hands on training. Zoey was eager to please her man, she followed every instruction and surpassed expectations. After slobbing on the knob, Zoey got fucked from behind while simultaneously getting her pretty little asshole licked. Her boyfriend and his Ex had their way with Zoey, they taught her a few valuable lessons that she'll never forget.
Resolution and refraction After ejaculation, the penis begins to lose its erection. About half of the erection is lost immediately, and the rest fades soon after. Muscle tension fades, and the man may feel relaxed or drowsy, according to Ingber. Men usually must undergo a refractory period, or recovery phase, during which they cannot achieve another erection. This period is variable in men, says Ingber. In an 18-year-old, this is typically less than 15 minutes. In elderly men, it can be up to 10 to 20 hours. The average refractory period is about half an hour. Men differ from women in that men usually are satiated after one orgasm. Women can experience more than one orgasm with no loss of sexual arousal, and do not have to undergo a refractory period.
Either way, you've got nothing to lose – you can now try it completely risk-free, it comes with a 60-day, 100% money-back guarantee. Just email me if your guy isn't absolutely blown away by your very next blowjob and I'll refund all of your money, no questions asked. However, I urge you to take advantage of my offer while all of these awesome free bonuses are still on the table. Spots are limited.
The best thing about giving a partner the first blow job is then you can ask for, essentially, an oral sex performance review. All sex—penetrative, oral, etc.—tends to get better with a partner as you get to know each other better and communicate more. As you're comfortable, ask your partner what he likes in a blow job, or how you can craft a BJ perfect for him. And if he's polite, he'll ask the same of you. A true win-win.

Sexually active individuals should get tested regularly for STIs and HIV, and talk to all partner(s) about STIs. Anyone who thinks that he/she might have an STI should stop having sex and visit a doctor or clinic to get tested. There are free and low-cost options for testing available. It is important to talk openly with a health care provider about any activities that might put a person at risk for an STI, including oral sex.
Fellatio may reduce the risk of miscarriages by inducing immunological tolerance in the woman by exposure to the proteins in her partner's semen, a process known as paternal tolerance. While any exposure to a partner's semen appears to decrease a woman's chances for the various immunological disorders that can occur during pregnancy, immunological tolerance could be most quickly established through the oral introduction and gastrointestinal absorption of semen.[31][32] Recognizing that some of the studies potentially included the presence of confounding factors, such as the possibility that women who regularly perform fellatio and swallow semen also engage in more frequent intercourse, the researchers also noted that, either way, "the data still overwhelmingly supports the main theory" behind all their studies—that repeated exposure to semen establishes the maternal immunological tolerance necessary for a safe and successful pregnancy.[32][33]

Sometimes, as guys, you may take it for granted that you are more into oral sex than your partner. That’s actually not true: Women really love oral sex too, and if we are asking for it, we should be giving the same and more back. Reciprocity is an incredibly important part of sexual satisfaction, and women can be satisfied tremendously via oral sex: it just takes a bit more effort and consideration on your part to make it the best experience it can be for her. 
Drive him wild: Have your man lie on his stomach and give him a massage by doing light, karate-chop type movements along his sacrum. "Doing this not only stimulates those sacral nerves, but also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which is key for relaxing, letting go, and having an orgasm," Michaels says. (Related: 7 Tips for a Better Orgasm)
Hey Jack, i had so much fun reading the book ! bad timing getting it during exam week ! i barely studied ! lol , and even read it at the job ! ( call center, not so bad ahahah ) well, totally worth it ! He even told me '' i dont think its healthy for me to cum that hard '' you made me proud of my blow jobs ! I never had problem with the passion part, in fact , before i felt like i enoyed giving him head more then he liked receiving it !! So a lot of the techniques were good for me. thanks again !
The risk of HIV being passed on during oral sex centres on fluid containing HIV (semen, vaginal fluid or blood) finding a way into the bloodstream of an HIV-negative person (via the mouth or throat, which is more likely if there is inflammation, or cuts or sores present). HIV is not passed on through exposure to saliva alone, so a person with HIV performing oral sex on someone who is HIV negative is not considered to be a transmission risk.
Each new partner does not come with an instruction manual, and you can’t always count on your partner to tell you exactly what she wants in the moment. If you’re looking for a hint or two to help you figure out what is working and what isn’t, you’ll have to rely on the next best thing: Her nonverbal cues. “Even if your partner is not a big moaner, her body will tell you everything you need to know," says Morse. Some signs to look for include quicker breathing, her body becoming flushed, a more engorged clitoris, more vaginal lubrication, and her thrusting her pelvis closer to you. "If all else fails, you can always ask her if she likes something or not — just be sure to phrase it in a sexy way so it sounds more like dirty talk than a request for feedback,” says Morse.
You can kiss his penis any way you want, but it will be a lot easier when you use your hand to hold it in place while you kiss it. There are multiple different ways to kiss his penis, from giving him small, quick ‘pecks’, to giving him longer, more intense kisses. He’ll especially love it if you give him extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don’t be surprised if you can see precum or semen dripping from his cock at this stage.
Three plays by Mae West. Great plays that have languished in the shadows all these years. They created great controversy, especially SEX and THE DRAG, which was banned from playing in New York City. It was about Drag Queens and Mae was brave to try to produce that play. She was a pioneer, and I am waiting for some savvy producer to bring back these plays. Wonderful read, great laughs.

Probably the worst thing you can do, pre-blow job, is underestimate your own abilities. Be confident! You're better at this than you think you are, and most guys are grateful that you ventured south at all. If you're truly nervous, tell your partner about it. And if that's off the table, talk about with some female friends. They've definitely been nervous, too. Talking it out can help, big time.


This decision is entirely up to you. There's nothing wrong with you if you don't want to, but it's nice to let your partner know it's nothing personal. If you don't want to swallow, and you aren’t familiar with the signs of imminent ejaculation, let him know you want a warning. Remove your mouth as he's about to ejaculate, and continue hand stroking through his orgasm.
^ Ken Plummer (2002). Modern Homosexualities: Fragments of Lesbian and Gay Experiences. Routledge. pp. 1920–1921. ISBN 1134922426. Retrieved August 24, 2013. The social construction of 'sex' as vaginal intercourse affects how other forms of sexual activity are evaluated as sexually satisfying or arousing; in some cases whether an activity is seen as a sexual act at all. For example, unless a woman has been penetrated by a man's penis she is still technically a virgin even if she has had lots of sexual experience.

Great lovers are made, not born! This is a point that I bring up time and time again. So many people expect sex to be effortless, but it rarely works that way in the real world. Just like any other skill, being good in bed takes time, practice, and education. There are so many topics to learn about, including sexual health, STI and pregnancy prevention, sexual technique, and communication.


It’s hard to describe just how hard having a female body can be. Women are expected to live up to the insane standards perpetuated by the media. We’re bombarded by Photoshopped images of perfect bodies and shamed for not living up these ideals. Every single body part is nitpicked to death. Aside from the usual flat stomach, perky boobs, and shapely butt, we’re supposed to have thin, toned arms, be cankle-free, and even delicate collarbones. On top of all of that, we’re socialized to believe that our genitals “look weird” and “smell funny.”
The Magic Missionary is a twist on the regular missionary position that simultaneously stimulates both your and his hot buttons (he gets extremely firm and strong glans stimulation; you get close clitoral stimulation). "Both the man and woman's groin areas stay in constant contact in this position, which can be amazing for orgasms," says Paget. "The heat and sensation are never ending." Most important, the position is fabulous for inducing the sort of muscular contractions that can move mountains. Mattress-wise, it's not an energetic action, explains Paget, but it puts your bod in more pleasure-enhancing motions than the spread-eagle style because it lets you move and squeeze more to build arousal. Plus, your man will be using some of his strongest muscles — his thighs and glutes — so he'll endure like the Energizer Bunny.
Oral sex is not necessarily an effective method of preventing sexually transmitted infections (STIs), although some forms of STIs are believed to be less commonly spread in this way, and oral sex has been recommended as a form of safe sex.[18][19][20] In the United States, no barrier methods for use during oral sex have been evaluated as effective by the Food and Drug Administration.[21] However, a barrier protection like a condom for fellatio or dental dam for cunnilingus can offer some protection from contact when practicing oral sex.[13]
While there's no male equivalent for the queening position, men deserve to feel like royalty, too. Receiving oral sex while seated in a comfortable chair, his lover kneeling in front of him, is perhaps the closest men can feel to sitting on a throne. Make it even more special by allowing him to watch a sports game, porn or another video of choice. Or put a special drink in his hand, or light a cigar before going down.
Oral sex should be limited to the protected areas. A makeshift dental dam can be made out of a condom[22] or a latex or nitrile glove,[23] but using a real dental dam is seen as preferable; this is because real dental dams cover a larger area, avoid accidents caused by "slipping" outside the covered area, and avoid the risk that makeshift versions may be accidentally damaged or poked with the scissors during the cutting procedure. Plastic wrap may also be used as a barrier during oral sex, but there exists no conclusive scientific research regarding how effective it may or may not be at preventing disease transmission. Certain kinds of plastic wrap are manufactured to be microwaveable and are designed to have pores that open when heated, but there also exists no scientific research on what effect, if any, this has on disease transmission when used during oral sex.[24] Some people complain that the thickness of the plastic dulls sensation.
The Blowjob Heaven Atmosphere. How you handle his brain is as important as how you handle his penis. You'll learn exactly how to build up sexual tension and anticipation by creating an erotic, relaxing, and unique atmosphere. Use this to capture his complete and undivided attention (every time). This "fit for Kings" treatment is what makes him put a diamond ring on your finger.

The Sultry Sidewinder allows you the sort of languishing, leisurely pace that, in the end, packs a real punch. (Slow and steady can win the climax race!) "Orgasms that result from a long, slow buildup are frequently much stronger than those that are achieved with fast and intense stimulation," explains Stubbs. "By savoring every single sensation, you're able to achieve a higher level of pleasure in the end." (Think of it like a getting-it-on gearshift — if you go straight from first to fifth, you get a quick drop-off, but if you go from first to second and so forth, your erotic engine will be humming by the time you get there.) Plus, this side-by-side setup is great for intimacy, which can sometimes get lost in the shuffle and storminess of sex. All the eye contact, kissing and closeness of this position will drive your slow climb to orgasm.


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When I first read your book I had never given a bj and I was extremely nervous and I had no idea what to do. Your advice helped me soooooo much I was so confident. My boyfriend actually asked if I was lying to him when I told him he was the first. None of the other stuff about this I found were as encouraging as yours and I couldn't belive how excited I was to give head. Now I do it all the time for my boyfriend and he adores me for it! One time I even did it while he was driving he loved it! Anyway I just wanted to thank you. Honestly your advice was so much help I you helped strengthen my relationship! Any girl who gives head, whether they are a beginer or a pro, they should check your book out. Thanks again!
The chance an HIV-negative person will get HIV from oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is extremely low. However, it is hard to know the exact risk because a lot of people who have oral sex also have anal or vaginal sex. The type of oral sex that may be the riskiest is mouth-to-penis oral sex. But the risk is still very low, and much lower than with anal or vaginal sex.
The Pleasure Man was put on trial 2 years after the premiere, charging the company for "sex, degeneracy, and sex perversion". The trial was riddled with homophobia, chastising the “degenerates” that they saw on the stage, and asking if their manners of female impersonation carried on off stage. The jury failed to reach a decision and the charges were dismissed. West never appeared in court and was fined $60,000[1]
7. A penis doesn't have eyeballs and can't tell the difference between the back of a throat and the roof of a mouth. All those slimy surfaces on the inside of your mouth basically just all feel the same. Except your teeth, obviously. I don't have a penis so I don't personally get the appeal of "deep-throating," but (gently) ramming the tip of his dick into the roof of your mouth feels like the same thing and it doesn't make you gag.
The chance an HIV-negative person will get HIV from oral sex with an HIV-positive partner is extremely low. However, it is hard to know the exact risk because a lot of people who have oral sex also have anal or vaginal sex. The type of oral sex that may be the riskiest is mouth-to-penis oral sex. But the risk is still very low, and much lower than with anal or vaginal sex.
But which sex gives and gets the most is a bit of a buzzkill. Slightly more women than men (59% as opposed to 52%) reported giving oral sex to their partner. Unsurprisingly, more men than women (63% versus 44%) reported receiving oral sex. Men were also less likely to reciprocate after women went down on them, breaking a major rule of sexual etiquette: 26% of women and only 10% of men reported giving oral sex but not receiving it.
^ Jump up to: a b c d See here and pages 47-49 for views on what constitutes virginity loss and therefore sexual intercourse or other sexual activity; source discusses how gay and lesbian individuals define virginity loss, and how the majority of researchers and heterosexuals define virginity loss/"technical virginity" by whether or not a person has engaged in penile-vaginal sex. Laura M. Carpenter (2005). Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences. NYU Press. pp. 295 pages. ISBN 0-8147-1652-0. Retrieved October 9, 2011.
The Nipples: Bursting full of nerve endings, the nipples are always a great way to turn him on without actually giving him anything. After a good kiss, and before you go down on him, pause at the nipples and lick, suck and bite on them (very, very softly, please, I don’t want to end up in a court case named ‘Bitten-Off Nipple vs Buonasorte’). Also, don’t forget that there are two nipples and not just one.
16. Penises that look small and non-menacing sometimes feel like novelty-sized pool noodles when they are inside of your mouth. Oh, it looked like a pinky finger from afar, but now that it's in your mouth, it's like one of those little toys that grows when you put it in water. What's happening in there? Who knows. Maybe we're all overestimating the size of our mouth holes.

Oral sex is common among sexually active adults. According to a national survey conducted from June 2006 through December 2008, over 80% of sexually active youth and adults ages 15-44 years reported having had oral sex at least once with a partner of the opposite sex. The same survey found that 45% or more of teenage girls and boys (ages 15-19 years) report having had oral sex with a partner of the opposite sex.


The Pleasure Man was put on trial 2 years after the premiere, charging the company for "sex, degeneracy, and sex perversion". The trial was riddled with homophobia, chastising the “degenerates” that they saw on the stage, and asking if their manners of female impersonation carried on off stage. The jury failed to reach a decision and the charges were dismissed. West never appeared in court and was fined $60,000[1] 

The Pleasure Man was put on trial 2 years after the premiere, charging the company for "sex, degeneracy, and sex perversion". The trial was riddled with homophobia, chastising the “degenerates” that they saw on the stage, and asking if their manners of female impersonation carried on off stage. The jury failed to reach a decision and the charges were dismissed. West never appeared in court and was fined $60,000[1] 

The sexy views of doggy style and (especially) reverse cowgirl can be great for ass men, who get to view (and touch) the ass as much as they like.  “When physical limitations do not intrude, there’s also a lot to be said for the excitement of lifting his partner up (legs around his waist for stability, and up against a wall for even more stability),” says Queen. 



Probably the worst thing you can do, pre-blow job, is underestimate your own abilities. Be confident! You're better at this than you think you are, and most guys are grateful that you ventured south at all. If you're truly nervous, tell your partner about it. And if that's off the table, talk about with some female friends. They've definitely been nervous, too. Talking it out can help, big time.
Once you give yourself permission to explore new ways of touching him, begin noticing his reactions. Pay exquisite attention to his responses. How does he respond when you touch ever so lightly around the head of his penis? Do faster or slower strokes peak his interest? Can you tell when he is really into it? What happens to his breathing? Does he make sounds to let you know when it feels good? By paying attention you'll gain valuable information about your lover's patterns of arousal and will be proficient in giving him pleasure. 
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